Tag Archives: cleaning

So tell me, is this really necessary?

 

 

I don’t know about you, but I’ve never had any trouble finding the toilet at 3:00am and certainly don’t need it to glow neon blue like some freaky interplanetary transport system.

 

Rotating fluorescent colors?

Hell… if I want a rave, I can think of better locations than my bathroom.

 

 

Cleaning isn’t a problem?

The scrubbing bubbles may disagree.

 

It’s a miracle… albeit a small one.

 

By now I think you’re all familiar with the giant barn we built a few years ago.

 

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The husband had visions of a man cave complete with bar, pool table and plenty of space to display his  totally useless crap  treasures.

What he got was a little different.

 

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This is what happens when you’re a hoarder in training. You have a more than ample 2 story space and you fill it with random  rubbish, recycled debris  stuff.

So the other day when the husband asked me if I would help him clear some of it out?

 

 

I admit I was a trifle excited.

 

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The future yard sale pile grew larger.

But don’t faint…. it’s mostly my things, with some items a friend left in his basement for the husband when he moved to Oklahoma. Yes, that’s the $800 scooter we bought on Craig’s List for the husband’s brother who said he wanted it but didn’t like it and never used it. My eyes did some serious rolling that day let me tell you.

 

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There was a lot of heavy lifting involved as none of the husband’s  rusty crap  treasures are light.

What… you don’t have an adjustable height potato planter that weighs as much as a medium sized water buffalo?

Why ever not.

 

 

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Of course he wanted most of these items upstairs.

 

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See that?

It’s a hay bale fork with a pulley system for the hay bales we’ll never have or be required to move. And guess what? When you drop it on your toe while climbing the stairs….

You curse it.

Quite colorfully as it turns out.

 

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As we spent the next few hours moving and sweeping and organizing…  ( okay, that was me and it was pretty fruitless because the husband refused to put anything in the trash pile, even this collection of tires that don’t fit any vehicle we own )  I realized my miracle clean out was really just a ‘move things around so you can see the floor again’ type of miracle. But hey, I’ll take what I can get.

Before  –

 

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After –

 

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Floor!

 

Part of it anyway.

 

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I wish I could make him understand how wonderful a space this could be if he would just part with all the junk. And I don’t mean everything….. mixed in with all the why the hell did you buy that! stuff are some legitimately interesting things.

 

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This old butter table is sweet.

 

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And I do love the old apple press.

Otis the Opsrey is waiting patiently to be installed on the roof as well.

 

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Though that baby is all mine and cost me a pretty penny.

But the ridiculous things he picks up and brings home because they’re free?

 

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They’ve got to go.

 

 

 

I knew it was going to be a banner day.

 

When I woke up to this…

 

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A big old rainbow in our backyard.. almost a double.

 

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And if that wasn’t beautiful enough?

Later in the day, this happened….

 

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My husband…. who never throws anything out?

Loaded up his truck and went to the dump!

 

 

He cleaned out the giant stack of empty boxes and some of the crap that’s been clogging our garage for years.

We went from this…

 

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To this…

 

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Walls.

I can see the walls!

And he even got rid of that old sink he brought home from God knows where.

 

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Of course now I can see the vintage cash register and faded bed frame that I had no idea he’d snuck in as well.

But hey…

Even miracles only go so far.

 

So, maybe.

 

Just maybe…

I should clean out my cupboards a bit more often.

We have a tall skinny cabinet in our kitchen. It’s not very wide, which constantly leads to items being pushed to the back to make room for new.

Sometimes they get pushed really far back. Really, really far back…

Like a solid mile and a half back.

For example, this container of chicken broth…

 

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Fat free!

Kudos to me for being healthy, right?

Well, I should have realized this wasn’t going to be good when I saw the label. The last time I bought fat free was when I was dieting……

 

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In 2014.

 

Things I like today.

 

1.  Kicking back on the barn porch on a summer evening after a long day of mowing and trimming the lawn?

Wonderful.

 

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Margarita in a can?

Not so much.

 

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But it’s alcohol.. with a view.

So I like.

 

2.  With a shout out to Mona at  Wayward Sparkles  who introduced me to this marvelous piece of mechanical engineering)

I read her blog and thought, damn…. I have to have one.

And then I thought, gifts!

So I had to have 2 more.

 

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Are you all here?

Good.

Viola!

 

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A bell you can ring to summon the elixir of the Gods.

In pink no less!

I believe this little darling will be getting quite a work out at Casa River.

If only I could order the hot cabana boy to go with it…

I like.

 

And finally, ladies…

Do you have old, dry wood?

No, I’m not talking about your husbands.

 

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We have stained wood moulding,  doors, window frames and sills, and built in stained bookcases etc. basically every piece of trim is unpainted wood. They’re original to the house and tend to dry out/fade from sunlight and winter heating.

So I found this on Amazon –

 

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Half a bottle did 12 doors and frames, 5 windows and frames and 2 large tables.

It’s good stuff. Witness the before and after…

 

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Brings back the shine and feeds your thirsty wood with very little effort.

I like.

 

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Thank you..

Thank you very much.

Zapped!

 

So I cruised my followers list the other day and did a bit of belated spring cleaning.

 

 

Good bye mortgage company people, how to make money online people, unique items you can’t find anywhere else people….

 

 

If you’re blatantly a business and have never commented, liked or read a single word I’ve posted?

 

 

You’re outta here.

I’ve been blogging for more years than I care to count, and while I enjoy WP immensely… I have to say I’ve never been on a site that has so much digital commerce.

For pity’s sake…. I have salesmen knocking on my door trying to sell me boxes of frozen meat. I have telemarketers calling nonstop trying to sell me car warranties and vinyl siding. I have girlfriends trying to rope me into attending a dinner party so they can sell me Pampered Chef products.

Enough already! My blog is a sales free zone.

And I’m zapping.

 

 

(Sorry, cleaning analogies are over. But that’s a chicken…

Riding a vacuum cleaner…

While laying an egg.

These things must be shared.)

 

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If you’re selling Cryptocurrency?

Please move along.

That’s not my idea of blogging.

Then there are these people…

 

 

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They set up a site but never use it.

Why do you bother, and why do you always follow me? I engage with my readers damn it!

So…

 

 

It’s surprising how many of these followers sneak in without you noticing.

When’s the last time you checked your list? I bet you have 50 or so lurking like I did.

Start zapping. It feels good to kick them to the curb….

 

 

Unless you’re one of those bloggers who needs a high follower count for personal validation.

Then by all means, you do you.

Feel free to have a bloated list.

I won’t judge.

 

 

Okay, maybe just a little.

The Meyer Briggs test said I have to…

 

P.S.  Sometimes I write and schedule blogs upwards of a week in advance. Since writing this?

Five of the zapped are back.

Perhaps I’m more irresistible than I thought.