Tag Archives: bathroom

Raise your hand if you want a robot in your toilet.

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No, I’m not kidding. And yes, I wish I was.

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Because even though I don’t enjoy elbow deep scrubbing in the commode, I’m not sure I want it roboticized either.

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Electrolyzed water? Why am I having visions of Victor Frankenstein…

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And while I’d love to be delighted by my bathroom… I seriously doubt sitting fully clothed in the tub blowing bubbles would be high on my list.

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Art I most definitely do not need.

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One little picture of Dudley on Facebook. That’s all it took for the Catopia algorithm to switch into high gear. And today? Unfortunately it’s bathroom themed.

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Yikes.

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Not anymore, no. Although thanks to Covid and an injured knee…. there is a whole lot more of it.

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Wow.

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I’d say this poster is a little cheeky, but that’s a tad too on point.

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If Dudley wanders in and hands me the toilet paper? I’m totally ditching Facebook.

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Bathroom products you might need.

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Or might not. That’s entirely up to you.

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Don’t discount alternative toilet paper. When the next Covid wave of hoarding shoppers comes through you’re going to wish you had grandma’s old Sears catalog.

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Good grief! If you’re losing that much hair in the shower? Seek medical help not a drain blocker.

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Now isn’t that just special?

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In the current Covid climate? This is the equivalent of one upping your neighbor. To heck with building a wrap around porch and landscaping with exotic flora…. displaying 8 rolls of toilet paper means you’ve arrived.

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Because sometimes a product review can have too much information..

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Like the one I saw for this questionable product.

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Have you noticed this trend… spraying before you go? It seems like Poo- Pourri type products are everywhere these days. But the following review went above and beyond.

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A cold, damp night… spicy chili and Westworld. You have to love a reviewer who sets the mood.

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Montezuma’s Revenge Meter? Nice.

Crab walking visual? Helpful.

Chili and eggs plotting a colon coup?

The plot thickens… so to speak.

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And just like that, the old tag line has now taken on a completely different meaning.

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Uh oh.

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When ya gotta go….

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Sometimes you just have to go. Which, when on the road during a global pandemic, can be a challenge.

Yesterday the husband had to physically enter his office for the first time since March to pick up some paperwork, so we took the scenic route which added a half hour to the hour long drive. The sun was shining, the leaves were turning…. life was good. Until those 2 large glasses of iced tea I had with lunch kicked in.

I don’t know what’s it like in your part if the world, but here in Maine a lot of the convenience stores, gas stations and fast food places have closed their rest rooms to customers for fear of spreading the virus.

It took us 4 stops to find a Burger King that welcomed people with full bladders. And by the look of the pictures on the doors? I wasn’t the only one in dire need.

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So tell me, is this really necessary?

 

 

I don’t know about you, but I’ve never had any trouble finding the toilet at 3:00am and certainly don’t need it to glow neon blue like some freaky interplanetary transport system.

 

Rotating fluorescent colors?

Hell… if I want a rave, I can think of better locations than my bathroom.

 

 

Cleaning isn’t a problem?

The scrubbing bubbles may disagree.

 

Do you Duluth?

 

For those not familiar with Duluth Trading Post…. it’s a clothing store with rather humorous commercials.

 

 

I say rather, because men usually get a bigger kick out of them than women.

 

 

Seeing that the subject matter is somewhat….. gender exclusive.

I’ve never had reason or opportunity to shop at Duluth, but recently a store opened in South Portland and my girlfriend wanted to go see what all the fuss was about.

Aside from some overpriced  ( $38 for a plain t shirt? I think not ) and under-styled clothes?

There were these:

 

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An entire section of stupid products.

 

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With a decided bent toward what you do in the bathroom.

 

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Color me unimpressed.

Although I did chortle at these…

 

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Because they reminded me of that horrible gynecologist I had who always asked me how things were “down there”.

Thankfully she lost her license to practice.

But who knows?

She might work for Duluth now….

 

 

Do you need one of these?

 

Stupid products. They’re everywhere…

Even here.

 

 

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I heard you. You think gas filters aren’t stupid?

Well, this one is for your butt.

 

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The bad part of a fart?

Pray tell, what exactly is the good part…

 

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For those of you who were looking for the perfect stocking stuffer for Xmas this year?

 

 

Next… no tie shoelaces.

 

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Because yes, apparently we really are that lazy.

 

 

 

On first glance this looked promising….

 

 

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Until I remembered the best thing about making S’mores on a campfire is that you don’t have to clean up anything.

Can you imagine the mess that contraption would make in your oven? Melted chocolate and gooey marshmallow crystallizing and baking onto the racks?

 

 

 

Finally, I admit this last stupid product has infinite potential.

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Now call me crazy, but a gentle reminder to change the toilet paper is not the first thing that came to mind when I thought of recording a message.

No…

I want more bang for my buck and was thinking more along the lines of the Tidy Bowl Man yelling  “Incoming!”….. or an upper class British accent begging you not to make a second trip to the buffet at Taco Loco.

 

 

As I said, infinite possibilities.