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I saw this on a passing vehicle the other day and I have to admit on first glance my mind went to a bad place…
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And while I’ve never even considered moving to New Mexico?
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A want ad like that could change my mind.
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For all the clueless seafood consumers out there. Always choose the pink scallops.
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And finally… is it me? Or is this hat mannequin I saw at a vintage clothing shop a little too happy?
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Every once in a while I check my email and get a surprise.
Not the good…hear from an old friend, winning lottery ticket… kind of surprise, no.
But something surprising all the same.
Who sent it? I neither know, nor care to find out.
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This guy performed an African elongation ritual and got ridiculous results.
Him and his hot wife went to Kenya a couple of years ago only to discover that native plants gave every local humongous penises.
The Maasai tribe, renowned in the scientific community for their unique 16 inches dongs and their well protected elongation method, gave this dude an extra 3 inches in the first few weeks after.
No wonder Porn stars are being put to shame.
Impressed by the results, he became friends with a few of the elders of the tribe and managed to learn their secrets while performing the ritual a couple extra times, with the same incredible results.
He stopped at 9,2 inches.
Just be responsible with this delicate info.
This ritual has created some monsters since it has been reproduced – around 112,000 to be more precise.
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After reading it, laughing about it and deciding to post it… I searched Google images for an appropriate photo of the aforementioned Maasai tribes people to accompany my blog.
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Does the email content explain why this person is happily jumping for joy?
You be the judge.
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Cats. They’re marvelous creatures who definitely know how to relax.
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And Lord Dudley Mountcatten takes full advantage of his spoiled and pampered life of leisure.
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He’s also the reason all the legs of our coffee table end in scratch marks …
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His fascination with wrapping himself around them is strange.
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But also too damned cute to stop.
❣️
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The husband and I were on our way home from a sad visit with his elderly uncle the other day when he surprised me with the offer to stop at one of my favorite watering holes.
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I say it was a surprise because while I love The Blind Pig and their creative pours, hubby isn’t a fan of their food and never wants to visit.
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Empty.. since it was the middle of the afternoon in the middle of the week, I dove right in.
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First up? A blackberry vanilla martini.
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The speed at which it disappeared literally raised my husband’s eyebrows.
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And while we weren’t there for a meal we did order a few nibbles. Barbecue wings for the husband, which he enjoyed despite his misgivings about the kitchen.
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And a massive plate of what turned out to be fabulously fresh and juicy chicken fingers for moi. I could only get halfway through the plate but they were so good they even made my other half agree he may have to reverse his ban on eating here.
Oh, cocktail #2?
A crisp and delightful pear mojito.
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Corn star.
Lawyers, guns and money.
Even the drink list will make you smile.
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While I could have happily sat there and drank all day, my final libation was a strawberry rhubarb margarita. Tasty, but honestly a bit too sweet for me.
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Pardon their typo at the end. With the quality of cocktails, I’m surprised the typist made it that far without errors.
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If you’re ever in Gardiner, Maine drop by.
You won’t be disappointed.
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Because it’s generally more fun than news you can.
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The future of porn is most definitely not in my living room, but this is a judge free zone. What you do with your holodeck is your own business.
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Bad pig… bad.
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For some reason my Facebook feed thought I needed this. At over $10 an inch? I think I’ll pass.
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I’m guessing the people who install the porn holodeck are the target audience here.
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It’s this kind of quality content that makes you glad you read my blog, no?
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We’ve had a beautiful bird of prey hunting around our property lately and I’m damned if I can identify him.
He’s a good size, pale feathered with black wing tips, and has been hard as hell to photograph because he flies very quickly.
I thought it might be an Osprey but there’s not enough brown.
I thought it was a juvenile red tail hawk, but it’s still too light in color.
These are the best shots I’ve managed so far, taken across the road on our neighbors farm.
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He skims the ground quite low.
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I’m sure it’s good mousing over there.
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Anyone have an idea who he is?
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When your household only contains two people, baking a ham for your husband means the ham becomes the proverbial Thanksgiving turkey and feeds you for a week.
Day one. – the baked (and not that spiral cut nonsense) ham with brown sugar glaze, mashed red potatoes and fresh garlic green beans.
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Day two – ham with the remaining pineapple and cherries, homemade macaroni and cheese and roasted Brussels sprouts.
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Day three – split pea and ham soup with honey cornbread. I can’t stand the stuff, so there’s a big bowl of leftover slop as well. And when it cools? It solidifies into a chunky green block. So appetizing. Not!
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Day four and day five- a rich and creamy ham casserole with egg noodles, carrots, broccoli, onions, Parmesan and cheddar cheese. This is yummy, but produces even more leftovers.
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Day six we reach the end of the bountiful hog and make ham salad for sandwiches.
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And lest you think we forgot his Lordship, trust me. He got a bowl of chopped ham as well.
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I saw a shirt in Goodwill the other day that made me laugh.
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Strategically placed boobies.
The blue footed kind…
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As someone who reads 3-4 books a week, these statistics completely blew my mind. But oddly enough, they also explain a lot.
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For my black thumbed friends who say they even manage to kill succulents… a beautiful solution.
My thumb is green, but even I’m tempted.
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This is pure gold.
🤣
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Nothing earth shattering here this morning….
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Just a melting snow in the backyard sunrise shot.
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Spring is out there.
Somewhere…
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I love a good festival.
In Maine we have the Lobster festival, the Clam Festival, and the Oyster festival. We have a Blueberry Festival, a Whoopie Pie festival and a Chowder festival. Folk, Reggae and Blues Festivals? Yup. We’ve got those too. Hell… we even have the White Nose Pete Fly Fishing Festival.
For my fishing obsessed readers, the legend of White Nose Pete –
https://midcurrent.com/stories-essays/the-legend-of-white-nose-pete/
Yes, festivals are grand.
Except this one… which makes me glad I don’t live in Dorchester County Maryland.
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Weird, not to mention disturbing.
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I can honestly say I’ve never seen anyone so excited about skinning a muskrat.
And to be honest, I hope I never do.
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Damn.
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Sorry, but that is not my idea of festive.
Oily goat with fish sauce?
Nope. Not for me.
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Good grief.
Whatever happened to baton twirling?
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River's world..... 