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You were hoping I would run out of these? No such luck…
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I’ll start –
Baby can I put my hair in your mouth?
Mildly disturbing… but not that funny. I’ll try again.
Baby can I put my baby in your car?
Even less funny. One more time –
Baby can I put my flowers in your closet?
Alright, my predictive text is predictably boring.
Your turn!
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Remember the Covid piñata I bought for the Christmas in July party?
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It was a huge hit. Everyone got in the spirit and had ideas on where to hang it.
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Not wanting the contents to spill into the pool, I recommended a nearby tree.
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A little lower please.
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Blindfolds were acquired and the swinging began.
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Poor girl had no idea my evil husband was messing with her aim. She managed to knock the germ off its hanger but didn’t break it… so it was rehung and more turns were taken.
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The pre med boyfriend finally bashed it open … (although it was against someone’s car, oops!) and pandemic appropriate goodies spilled out.
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They were quickly scooped up and examined. At first people laughed, because how often do you have portable toilet paper in a piñata?
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But then everyone was stuffing their pockets for the next apocalyptic run on Charmin.
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The Covid ball?
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It looked rather like a dirty Pac Man and was claimed as well.
To be continued …
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Come on. You know you want to…
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I am seriously and utterly screwed.
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My only weapon is the tiny water pistol I use on his Lordship when he scratches the furniture. So unless zombies melt like the Wicked Witch of the West?
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I’m screwed.
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Yes, again. Humor me and play along.
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Those dastardly criminals better watch out.
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I was in the middle of giving myself a pedicure… so I guess I’ll slather the burglars with foot cream and hope they’ll be too slippery to burgle.
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Yes, again. Stop complaining.
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I’m currently binge watching Showtime’s original series Billions.
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It basically has two main characters…. the ruthless billionaire hedge fund king and the twisted US Attorney who wants to take him down. Both of them are a combination of good and bad, but I’m afraid if it comes to a choice between being a billionaire and a government employee?
River will take door number one and enjoy luxury homes, private jets, a kick ass yacht and the Lamborghini every time.
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I just binge watched all 3 seasons of Penny Dreadful… and if you know anything about that series, you’ll know that would be one wild and crazy wedding.
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Stop rolling your eyes. It’s not painful… and they make me chuckle.
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I’ll start.
My drag Queen name is…. Julianna Creme Horn. Which, when you think about it… couldn’t be more appropriate.
🤣
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So the free pool table… the one that has cost us approximately $14,000 ( and counting ) in storage barn to man cave renovations… actually saw some action last weekend.
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Two of the husband’s coworkers came by for the afternoon (no worries, all 3 men are fully vaccinated) for Cajun gumbo, beer and pool. I don’t play, so I know my other half was happy. And me? I was happy because I received another bar christening gift.
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I’d never even heard of this whiskey but it turned out to have a pleasing toasted undertone.
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After two games of pool, it was determined the table needed to go from horizontal placement to vertical to allow more shooting space.
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Which then required multiple leveling maneuvers. Turns out the barn floor is not at all level. Shocking, I know.
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Play continued into the night, as did the whiskey drinking and strange reflections from the overhead lighting.
A good time was had by all… and let me tell you, it was nice to host even two people after a year of no socializing with friends.
😊
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So I had to buy it.
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Because our weekly Scrabble games demanded it… and I’m tired of the husband getting mad when I tell him his word doesn’t exist.
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Hornito is a mound of volcanic matter?
I always thought it was a tequila.
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I admit to not knowing recta was the plural of rectum… and won’t comment on its proximity to the word rectory.
Nope. Not going there.
And speaking of Jesus…
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All this was fascinating but I draw the line here.
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Grr should not be an acceptable Scrabble word.
And grrrl?
Apparently it references a feminist punk rock movement in the Northwest called Riot Grrrl.
I call foul. And despise common usage additions to dictionaries.
P.S. don’t tell my husband.
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Whoever dreamed up this card game is a genius.
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Apparently it’s some kind of memory game…
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But that doesn’t matter.
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Because even though I’ll never play it?
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I adore it!
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I mean really…
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How can you not?
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River's world..... 