You all know I like them. You all know my husband is the evil man who won’t let me have them.
(Okay, so in complete honesty he says I can have them… but I have to be the one who goes out in the minus 20 degree winter temperatures to feed, water, and clean the coop in mid January and we all know that’s not happening.)
Yeah… no.
But if I did have them?
I would totally be on board with the latest chicken trend.
Tutus!
Chickens…
In tutus!
Granted, not all of them look thrilled with the idea.
And okay, watch out for that one. He looks homicidal….
If you don’t spend countless hours staring out the window with camera in hand to see if a new bird has shown up at the horrendously expensive buffet of seeds, nuts and suet you arrange on what used to be your laundry pole?
Feel free to skip this post.
But birders will get it.
The other day I spotted a Red Bellied Woodpecker. They used to be relatively rare in Maine and all the field guides say they shouldn’t come any farther north than Massachusetts… yet here they are.
Trying to get an unobstructed shot of one proved a bit more difficult.
Juvenile starlings are notorious photo bombers.
Almost…
Finally.
An even rarer spotting was this Scarlet Tanager.
They’re usually forest dwellers and our place is pretty open.
So I was tickled pink when this little beauty showed up.
Or red, as the case may be.
That’s the wonderful thing about bird watching, you never know what you’ll see.
By now our Baltimore Orioles are usually long gone, but this year I bought a feeder that houses grape jelly so they seem to be sticking around.
These two made me laugh.
They seemed to be squaring off for an orange eating contest.
Granted it doesn’t provide the same excitement of hot dog eating contests…
But there’s also less chance of projectile vomit…
So that’s a plus.
Bird watching… there’s never a dull moment.
Alright, I lie. There are plenty of excruciatingly dull moments, but when something special does happen?
The old old, my ass! nothing should die in 6 years except reality tv shows. Why are they still alive? fridge.
The new black stainless steel OMG don’t walk near it with anything sharp finish fridge –
The old no damn it, it wasn’t! fridge –
The new polish with the grain, who the hell knew stainless steel had a grain? fridge.
Delivery was a logistical nightmare. It wouldn’t fit through our kitchen door, even though it was the exact same size as our old one. The kids who brought it (yes, they were younger than me… that makes them kids) couldn’t figure it out for the life of them and were dismantling it piece by piece in our front yard when (wise old me) suggested they bring it through the (larger) front door.
With age comes wisdom.
And wrinkles, and bunions, and hot flashes…
But I digress…
Once they wrangled it inside, the kids couldn’t get the water dispenser to work and were frantically searching manuals and calling for assistance when I suggested they turn the water line back on.
So after 2 1/2 hours dealing with morons we had a brand new fridge.
With fancy graduated lighting for my husband Goldilocks who wasn’t satisfied with anything else….
The hunt for a new refrigerator continues, and just as I had finished extensive research and narrowed the field down to this one…
The husband decided he wanted to go shopping and check them out for himself.
Granted, it’s a large purchase and I wanted him to like what I chose.
But ya know what?
I took him to the store and showed him my choice, which he walked right by and made a bee line for:
No.
And again? No.
Aside from the jaw dropping price tag? There’s no way I’m going to buy a refrigerator that tells me I’m out of cucumbers or what to cook for dinner.
Christ, do we really need “smart” appliances?
The day I’m too old and doddering to realize I’m out of cucumbers? I’ll stop cooking altogether.
In case you’re unfamiliar, there’s basically a computer on the door. You can make grocery lists, find recipes with the ingredients it knows are in there, and it will even link with your phone so you can check your expiration dates from remote locations.
Among other useful things….
Geesh.
All I want is cold food and ice.
Great. Scratch the ice.
So we shopped, and shopped, and shopped.
And the husband said that one’s shelves were too small, that one’s lights were too bright, that one’s drawers were too deep…. etc etc etc.
To which, after grueling 5 hours I said..
“Come on Goldilocks!”
So he picked one.
And though it’s almost exactly the same as the one I’d picked a week earlier?
This one is $700 more.
So, men?
I don’t want to hear you say your wives are spending all the money.
My husband can out shop the best of ’em.
Where there's only one step from the sublime to the ridiculous.
River's world..... 