Tag Archives: shortages

Quick… list them on eBay!

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On our way home from our scenic drive the other day we stopped for a cocktail ( or two ).

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Repeat after me… martinis are not made with rum. Nope. Uh uh. Never. Cherry Gin Ricky it is.

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Nice flavor, but a little too sweet so I asked the bartender to dial back the grenadine on #2. Bartenders are wonderful people, so helpful and attentive to our needs.

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Cocktails with my husband always requires food, so he ordered mussels while I opted for Truffle fries. Both were yummy but the real news? Even after I declined ketchup, 3 packets made their way to our table.

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Oh, the extravagance! After the waitress said she couldn’t take them back due to Covid rules… and when my husband remembered there was a shortage causing people to list them on eBay for $15 per… he scooped them up and brought them home. Where they’ll languish in the drawer until the next global pandemic lockdown.

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Forget toilet paper.

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There’s a new product shortage right around the corner.

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Yes, it’s true.

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So if you’re hard up for cash? Start digging through your car’s glove compartment for the ketchup you threw in there during your road trip to see the world’s largest ball of twine back in ‘04. That stuff is gold!

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Because the price gouging has begun.

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In reality I guess it makes a perverse type of sense.

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20 packets for $50 doesn’t seem like a bargain to me.

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But in a few months, maybe it will be.

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Not worthy of their own posts.

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We drove through a small town the other day where I saw a building named after me.

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But it was a gym and not a bar, so clearly they have no idea who I am.

In news from the grocery store, it looks like there was a run on kitty litter.

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Are we hoarding that now? Damn. I didn’t get the memo.

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Ha! You have to love clever ad men.

And finally, I bought a calendar for the barn bar.

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It’s appropriate as fork.

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Pandemic humor.

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Because we all need to laugh more often.

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I don’t know, but FFS…. someone send her back.

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How exactly does one do that?

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We’ll all be doing this come January.

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Yes.

That sounds about right.

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Guess it’s been a rough year for everyone.

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Oh, those Brits.

Ever helpful with the good advice.

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Here’s hoping your holiday is happy, safe and free of tactical response teams.

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CSA and grocery store chuckles.

 

The summer bounty continues.

 

 

And if you’ve never tried fresh lemon basil?

Please do. It’s wonderful.

 

 

Vegan bratwurst?  Oh, the horror!

Kindly keep your kale out of my artery clogging sausage. If this shows up at the next beer festival I attend….. there will be blood in the streets.

 

 

My only question here is… why?

And for something on the opposite end of the spectrum…..

 

 

Which also makes me ask… why?

 

 

Heritage popcorn?

Proof positive yuppies will buy anything that’s ridiculously overpriced.

 

 

Is it any surprise this was the only bottle left? I think not.

And finally, the real shock of the day.

 

 

Toilet paper is back… and brand names at that!

So if you heard them broadcast a code for ‘crazy lady doing happy dance on aisle 13’?

Pay no attention, the unadulterated joy of not wiping my butt with sandpaper just got away from me for a moment.

Wiped out.

 

A girlfriend told me she went shopping yesterday and still couldn’t find any toilet paper on the shelves. My usual reaction to this is an eye roll and an under the breath sputter of “people be crazy”…. but this time I thought I’d do a little research.

 

 

Exactly.

It’s not an intestinal virus FFS! Why is everyone still hoarding the Charmin?

 

Whaaat!

The average American uses 141 rolls a year?

Christ on a cracker, that’s 2.71 rolls a week… per person! My husband and I have only used 2 rolls in the last 3 weeks…. together.

What are you people doing with it….

Wallpapering the bathroom while you sit?

 

Panic Room…

2020 style.

 

I was 9 years old during the embargo, so can someone please explain why toilet paper prices were raised? Did people use it as an alternate energy source?

If so, how many miles per roll did it get?

And speaking of alternatives….

 

A million dollars worth of bidet attachments in a day.

 

 

Take that Cottonelle!

So concludes my treatise on toilet paper.

But let me leave you with this… when you’re a writer researching a topic for an article? I’m not sure it gets any better than being able to quote a source named Tushy.