It’s Fall y’all!
Autumn is my favorite time of year.
Crisp air, apples, pumpkins and fiery trees….
And though I live in New England…
And see Mother Nature’s glorious show every October….
I never tire of it.
I’m a certified leaf peeper…
So when I crash my car into one of those pretty colored trees because I’m driving home one handed snapping pictures for my blog?
I’m telling the police it’s your fault.
And will expect you lot to start a GoFundMe page for my car repairs and hospital bills.
I like….
These!
Have you tried them yet?
Well, what are you waiting for?
Go!
I like….
Taking a break on our deck after mowing the lawn a few weeks ago, and having a friend show up.
I thought for sure he’d run when he saw me. But he took a good look, deemed me no immediate threat and happily settled in for a nap.
Until the husband opened the door and scared him off.
I like….
Reading that a lobsterman in Falmouth caught a rare 1 in 100 million cotton candy blue lobster….
Took a picture… and donated him to an aquarium where he never has to worry about being captured or eaten again.
I like…
Amazing sunrises in our backyard.
I like….
Driving home along country roads this time of year and seeing the trees bursting with color.
Autumn in New England is hard to beat.
Life is good!
Because sometimes I want to share, and they just don’t rate a blog of their own.
A few shots of my local area.
I’m blessed to live in such a beautiful state.
Top that for sunrise color. I dare ya!
As you’ve probably guessed by now, when we travel…. I take a lot of pictures. The husband is quite patient with me and usually pulls over when I point out the window, squeee! and yell pull over. He never wants to photograph anything, so I had to laugh a few weeks ago when he stopped along side something and asked me to take a picture of it for him.
I did….
And am seriously hoping it doesn’t end up in our barn in the near future.
This is not what you want to be following during a traffic jam on Route 1. I saw pink hippos in my dreams for many nights after that.
And finally…
Me.
No makeup, just a smile…. and the realization that laying out in the sun this past summer has bleached my hair to the point where I now have dark roots without ever having dyed it.
What the Hell?
Work on the baby barn project graduated from glacially slow to slow as molasses last weekend…. and we managed to frame a wall in 3 days.
Though to be fair, ripping off that old rotted pressboard is like Chinese water torture.
It literally shreds in your hands.
But slowly… we saw daylight.
And by Saturday afternoon we had open space and a center post that was barely hanging on.
And by barely?
I mean barely.
The husband did the usual dirt shuffle in his ongoing attempt to level the building. A pipe dream at best as it was built in the mid 70’s… and it’s Maine.
Frost heave central.
Measuring is fun.
Ripping out posts that were nailed in with spikes?
Not so much.
Pardon the sun glare and bad manicure… but damn.
Talk about overkill.
Framing started Sunday, with a new window taking center stage.
And continued when the husband decided to dig out all the dirt underneath the structure…
And lay paving stones in yet another attempt to level it.
Then came the rain… and a mad dash to put everything away before it got soaked.
And then?
Then… the baby barn got a rainbow.
And I found my honey at the other end.
Can I get an awwww?
I stumbled across something the other day and I’m afraid I have to share.
Who knows, some of you may thank me.
Yes.
There is a website where you can actually order a fart.
In a jar.
And while I fully support small businesses and entrepreneurs, I have to wonder….why?
Why do we need a variety of jarred farts?
It’s not the first thing I think of when I ask myself, “What do I get the man who has everything?” …. but maybe someone does.
You have to admit the ad campaign is catchy.
“Make a start and choose your fart.”
Who knows?
Maybe it’s the gift your significant other has always wanted…. but was afraid to ask for.
And if that’s the case?
Christmas shopping just got a little easier this year.
Remember…
You saw it here first.
Next up in my continuing series on the absolutely crazy things people will pay money for Maine Adult Education is…. LEGOS.
Yes, LEGOS.
Those annoying little plastic toy pieces we’ve all stepped on and paid the price.
And while there have been some other ridiculous classes…
You’re never too old to learn…. Spoons.
You’re never to old to learn…. Potatoes.
You’re never too old to learn…. Ukulele
You’re never too old to learn…. Chakra Toning.
You’re never too old to learn…. Mindfulness.
You’re never to old to learn…. Tin Cans.
You’re never too old to learn…. Knotweed Flutes.
You’re never too old to learn… Succulent Picture Frame.
This one, and it’s how the hell can we make this nonsense sound like a legitimate college course description really made me laugh.
Oh, it’s a facilitated process? Well, that explains everything.
And they use specially selected LEGO elements! Wow.
Does that mean the red ones… or the green?
The group discussion would be interesting to hear. Problem solving and decision making? Give me a break… exactly what wisdom will you gain?
Okay, there’s that.
But hey, you’ll be utilizing kinesthetic skills and will be required to learn and listen.
This is Serious Play!
Taught by a Serious Play facilitator!
Of course when I was young, the people who took LEGOS seriously usually ended up like this….
But maybe times have changed.
If you haven’t guessed by now, I take a lot of pictures.
My life may not be fascinating…
But it’s damn sure well documented.
And what’s a blog for if not sharing random baby deer photos from earlier this summer?
Not much to comment on.
Just enjoy the sweetness…
While I organize my photo files.
And if you’re not into cute furry 4 legged babies?
Then tune in again next time…
When I’m sure to have more meaningless drivel.
I don’t like….
Ordering flowers over the phone for a friend who just had surgery down in North Carolina. I wanted a large, impressive arrangement and was very specific with my request. I said….
No carnation fillers.
All pink and purple.
An interesting vase… definitely no clear glass.
So what did they deliver for $160?
A clear glass vase, filled with carnations… and a few yellow roses and orange gerber daisies stuck in for no other reason than to piss me off.
$160 worth of everything I didn’t want!
I don’t like….
Ordering a pair of hard to find little batteries from Amazon that fit in an envelope.
And having it come in a box.
Talk about overkill.
I don’t like…
Reading Maine native Stephen King’s latest,
And realizing he’s lost his touch.
This new book? Meh…
Don’t bother.
I don’t like…
Buying a tin of Altoids to keep in my car,
Getting them home and realizing…
They’re slightly past their prime.
2009?
Damn. That’s worse than what I have in the back of my kitchen cabinet.
I don’t like….
My husband getting called into work on a weekend because,
Some idiot doesn’t know how to steer his hot air balloon.
Oops!
The name of the novel that inspired the film Blade Runner was Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?
I do because…..
I find it rather disturbing.
As should you…
Did you know…
La Brea means The Tar? So when you talk about ‘the La Brea Tar Pits’ in California you are actually saying The The Tar Tar Pits.
Talk about overkill.
Did you know…
Hindu men once believed it was unlucky to marry a third time so they avoided misfortune by marrying a tree? It was then burned, freeing them up to marry again.
I imagine it went like this:
Did you know…
Did you know…
Due to a different gravitational force, if you weigh 200lbs on earth….. you would weigh 76 lbs on Mars?
Come on Elon.
Momma needs a trip to Mars.
Yeah, you’ll need to put that down first.
Did you know….
An octopus’s testicles are located in it’s head?
He also can remove his spermatophore-loaded mating arm and give it to a female if she’s hungry and likely to eat him.
Work on the baby barn continues, albeit slowly.
My husband’s master plan involves a serious amount of temporary screwing, refitting, removing and replacing. He’s not a huge fan of measuring… but he’s a man.
This is not surprising.
Of course this means 3 times as much work.
I think one planned demolition and rebuild would suffice…. but I’m a woman.
What do I know?
There’s also a good deal of shifting the husband’s crap we don’t need now, nor will we ever need again stuff from one place to another. Like the hurricane generator we bought in 1992 when we lived down south and haven’t used since.
Or the wheel weights for the tractor we no longer own.
Or the numerous tires for the cars we no longer own.
Or the table that went with the chairs we no longer own….
Right beside the small refrigerator I had no earthly idea we owned.
All of these things are heavy and filthy and must be moved over and over again because he can’t be convinced to throw them out.
Good times.
There was hammering.
And crowbar-ing …. and yes. A good deal of cursing because the structure is 45 years old and not exactly plumb.
There was also a good deal of displaced dirt.
Thanks to numerous woodchuck tunnels…
Which undermined our attempt to simply re-side and re-shingle the damned thing.
Now we have to completely dig up the hard packed floor and smooth it all out.
Doesn’t that sound like fun?
River's world..... 