Tag Archives: humor

Celebrating 36 years of not killing each other…..

March 27, 2020 Rivergirl 34 Comments

Yes, there’s that as well.

This was the very first picture of us ever taken ….

Back in 1984, on that awful chair at his mother’s house…… right before we got married. I may look twelve, but no worries. I’d just turned 20. (As for the husband’s hair… I have no idea what was going on there.)

We knew each other for 6 days.

Yes, you read that correctly…. 6 days. And to be honest, 3 of those were the required waiting period for the marriage license.

People thought we were crazy. (We knew we weren’t.)

Me & Fred, boat

People said it would never last. (It’s been 36 years.)

Me & Fred, ballfield

The Grateful Dead had it right…..

What a Long Strange Trip It’s Been!

Me & Fred, Harley Rally 2

But I wouldn’t trade a minute of it.

Anyway…. this year on our anniversary?

A seriously beautiful bouquet from my other half….

That got better every day as all the blooms opened up.

The rose colors were gorgeous.

Then it was off to our favorite restaurant in Boothbay Harbor…. before their doors were shut due to the virus. The decor is nothing to write home about, and the menu is smaller in winter….. but the food is still fabulous.

As were the seasonal cocktails.

I started with a Ciderberry.

And moved on to a few Sugar Plums made with this.

OMG!!

If you’ve never payed attention to any of my advice before?

Start now… and buy a bottle.

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It doesn’t matter if you’re not a fig fan. I actually hate the things.

But this was like nothing I’d ever tasted before. A very unique flavor. I read they also make a Golden Apricot ….. and I’ll be looking for that as well.

Can’t remember what they called my appetizer but it was delicious, with just the right amount of spice.

Husband went with his usual French Onion soup and a light main dish of broiled haddock and asparagus.

I, on the other hand….

Dove into the richest, creamiest most delightful Parmesan risotto you’ll find this side of Italy. It’s one of their specialties and I can never resist…. paired here with pan seared scallops, mushrooms, arugula and a citrus balsamic glaze.

I don’t care how many pounds I gained…

It was worth it!

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I am a Frustrated Frito.

March 25, 2020 Rivergirl 37 Comments

In case you’re wondering why….

Who are you?

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Things that fall into the WTH? category.

March 25, 2020 Rivergirl 31 Comments

When checking out at the grocery store last week I saw these….

Rap Snacks.

I’m sorry, but no one needs Cardi B. flavored potato chips.

The woman wore a coffee filter to the Grammys. Enough said.

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Something else no one needs?

This….

I believe I actually said WTF when I first saw it.

Now come on…. if you have that much facial hair to catch?

Skip shaving altogether and put your beard in a pony tail like all fashion forward men do.

I think by now you all know of my lifelong aversion to dolls.

They’re creepy…. and if you don’t want me to spend the night? Put a few of them in the spare bedroom and watch me run.

But this?

This is the stuff of nightmares.

And speaking of that?

I was cruising Atlas Obscura a while back for an interesting day trip and their recommendation gave even me pause.

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Yes, you and your significant other can visit the picturesque vistas of Turkmenistan and tour the Gates of Hell.

And if you think I’m kidding?

I’m not.

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Admittedly…. as tourist attractions go, it’s a little strange.

But I’d still rather go there than back to Busch Gardens.

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What do you do when it snows a foot during a pandemic quarantine?

March 24, 2020 Rivergirl 11 Comments

Well, if you live in Maine….

You have a snow sculpture contest!

That strange looking blob turned into this:

A goldfinch on a nest.

It gets my vote….

But here are some other entries.

Small snowman.

Snow frog.

Large snowman.

Musical snowman.

Upside down snowman.

Snow horse.

Snow bunny.

Snow pig?

Snow mermaid.

And a snow public health advisement…

Someone posted this as well …..

I love it, but have a feeling it was pulled off the net and not a local entry.

A+ for originality though.

Cheers!

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Ah… spring.

March 24, 2020 Rivergirl 29 Comments

Spring in Maine looks a little different than most places….

Because we woke up to this today.

We didn’t have nearly enough snow this winter, but now? Almost a flippin’ foot fell overnight.

Daffodils and tulips?

Not quite yet.

And because all that heavy wet snow knocked out our satellite feed and someone can’t stand to be without the news for 5 minutes?

Yeah.

This.

At 6:30 am.

Looks like fun, no?

Ah…

Spring!

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I love my town…. Part 7.

March 24, 2020 Rivergirl 26 Comments

It’s time to take a look at my local Facebook page again.

And when I did, I realized how critter-centric it’s been lately.

Goats were on the loose again.

And apparently craving pumpkin pie.

This was a bit disturbing.

It’s not often someone is actively seeking deer guts, even around here.

Makes you wonder what this poor guy did.

“…for whatever purpose you would like.” probably doesn’t bode well for that bird.

And speaking of Sunday dinner –

As much as I’d like to come home to a nice meal, the thought of letting a stranger into my kitchen to cook seems a bit odd.

They might find that fuzzy, 11 month old spear of asparagus that got pushed to the back of the fridge… and that’s bound to be embarrassing.

And lastly, there was some news on the crime beat.

Duck theft.

Because sometimes people can’t help themselves.

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A little catch up… the baby barn, a sunrise and some deer.

March 23, 2020 Rivergirl 21 Comments

Now that the Virginia vacation saga is finally over, it’s time to clear out the photo files.

If you remember… before we left for the Cape Cod vacation in November, the husband was desperately trying to finish the remodel on our baby barn from Hell before the snow started flying.

He started putting the siding on….

Which was a nightmare of non squared corners and uneven ground.

Yeah, there was a lot of that.

His answer? Plant a shrub in front of it.

He was still using his 1950’s power tools and probably wishing for a larger wheelbarrow.

Siding around the window resulted in some very colorful language.

As did turning the 3rd corner where things didn’t exactly line up.

Unfortunately that’s as far as he got before the weather turned….

And now I have to stare at this split personality horror show until spring.

In other news, our neighbor and her daughter fed our deer while we were gone.

She sent me this picture while we were in Williamsburg, and wanted me to know the child took her responsibility seriously.

And for that she was rewarded.

Flowers for mom and a thank you deer for her daughter.

That little guy cost me a fortune but he was hand made and too damned cute to resist. Look at those feet!

It snowed right after we got back.

But the white stuff sure does make a nice contrast for the sunrise.

We were happy to see our resident buck was still around.

He’s an impressive fellow….

And clearly his women agree.

He’s got quite a little harem going.

With 4 fawns that we know of.

Funny thing is….. as much as I love to travel, it’s sights like these that always make me glad to be home again.

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Because I’m helpful.

March 22, 2020 Rivergirl 33 Comments

Since we’re all staying home and social distancing in an effort to slow the spread of virus, we’re going to have a lot of time on our hands.

We can blog.

Or Read.

Or binge watch our favorite trashy Netflix series.

But for the crafty and artistic few among us?

Please feel free to steal this idea.

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Just be sure to post your versions when you do.

The rest of us are still bored.

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Day 16…. the trip home.

March 22, 2020 Rivergirl 32 Comments

As we were leaving the resort for the 12 hour plus drive home, I found this behind a door.

Clearly the previous tenants vacationed in the coat closet and didn’t want to be disturbed.

And yes, you read that correctly. This will be my last blog about the Williamsburg, Virginia vacation.

To think it only took me 60 posts to get here!

So…. it was a grey overcast morning the day we left.

And I have absolutely no idea what this was.

But here’s the Washington Monument….

And the entrance to a tunnel.

Was my husband obeying the speed limit?

No.

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He never does, but when you’re riding in a rental Brontosaurus and the lanes get smaller due to construction? My blood pressure ruses when he approaches 100 mph.

I also look out the side window a lot.

Although it’s hard to focus properly at that speed.

Playing with my phone helps…

As does laughing at some slightly painful road names.

Here’s the Delaware Memorial Bridge.

And the toll ticket that cut off our George Washington Bridge exit price on the bottom.

For those of you who have never seen the New York City skyline on an overcast day from the New Jersey Turnpike at 90 mph?

Here you go.

Next up was the George Washington Bridge, where I usually close my eyes and pray to the God of Tequila that I’ll live to see another margarita.

Ironically… as soon as I started filming, the husband slowed down. Which is a good thing since the roads were potholed and in horrible shape.

Traffic was a nightmare.

But it always is.

And every time we pass these massive apartment complexes….

I realize how blessed we are to live in the country.

Was this water blowing off the top of that truck?

No. It was smoke, because something was probably on fire. When we crept up next to it and signaled the driver there was a problem?

He flipped us off.

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Ya gotta love New Yorkers.

The rest of the trip was long, traffic laden and uneventful.

We were even too pooped to make our normal pit stop at the tax free New Hampshire liquor store.

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Technically I took a few more…. but still.

Why is sitting in car doing absolutely nothing for 13 hours so damn tiring?

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The last supper….. in Williamsburg.

March 21, 2020 Rivergirl 20 Comments

This is for the food (and drink) people.

An entire post devoted to our final meal in Virginia. (That’s 2 in 3 days so no more complaining!)

(On a side note, it was Bogart day last Sunday and the husband and I did nothing but eat, drink and watch the classics.

The Maltese Falcon. Key Largo. The Caine Mutiny. African Queen. And my all time favorite movie … Casablanca. I cry at the nightclub scene when they drown out the Germans by singing La Marseillaise… every damn time! Good stuff.)

But back to food.

After spending 8 hours in an antique store that day I was in dire need of a cocktail.

Or eight.

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And when I saw a sign for Eddie Romanelli’s?

I may have squealed.

I didn’t think this was a chain, but there was one in Wilmington, North Carolina we used to make a pilgrimage to every other month when we lived down south. Their Crabmeat Cannelloni in Carolina Shrimp Sauce?

To die for.