As we’ve previously established, my small rural Maine town has a sense of humor. This was on full display today when I saw an offer of services on the town’s Facebook page.
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While I would have appreciated a good Mother in Law trap back in the day, the picture in this post will probably give me nightmares of the inevitable beaver uprising for weeks to come.
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While we had an extremely mild winter with very little snow this year, we did have rain. And ice. And more rain. Which lead to rapid melting, soft earth, mud and occasional washouts. Imagine driving over this section of road?
Yikes.
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Sadly, this is the only bunny I’ve ever seen in our town.
I like new tech. My husband? Not so much. It shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that my husband uses his cell phone as … don’t faint… an actual phone. You know, to speak with people like we did in the old days before texting was invented and we didn’t have to.
His phone was old. Moldy green cheese old. It was an iPhone 4 he bought in 2010… we’re talking the tech equivalent of a dinosaur fossil. It didn’t matter that it couldn’t be updated, that the battery had to be charged every few hours, that the home button stuck more often than not or that the display was blurry and dark. He liked it because he was used to it and fears new technology in general. No matter how many times times I encouraged him to trade it, he refused.
Until last week when we got a letter from Verizon Wireless saying they’ll be switching to a 5G network on December 31rst and my husband’s beloved antiquated phone will cease to exist. Kaput. Dead. Bye bye. Needless to say the other half wasn’t pleased and railed against the injustice of obsolete tech for hours on end.
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Cool typewriter aside, Verizon was doing just that, so I dragged my sputtering husband to the Verizon store the next day to upgrade his phone before the rush caused a stock shortage. And believe me, he sputtered. He sputtered on the drive there, he sputtered to the other customers, he sputtered to the sales associate, he sputtered to the check out girl and he sputtered on the drive home. Why he was sputtering when we managed to snag a great deal I’m sure I don’t know. The man just likes to sputter.
His old iPhone was worth exactly nothing, but they gave him a $700 credit, with which he bought the new iPhone 13 …. price tag $800. $100 for a new phone? Sweet! And because the deal was so good? I traded in my XR on the 13 Pro Max and only paid $200 for a $1,300 phone. Even sweeter! And just when I thought it couldn’t get any better? I learned our bill will be $24 less a month.
Score!
Does the husband like his new phone? After an hour of very patient instruction from yours truly, he wouldn’t give me the satisfaction… but I think he loves it. And I hope that’s true, because Lord knows he’ll probably keep it until 2034.
And so we reach the end of another series of highlights. I have to say, Mary Roach has really grown on me. I live for weird and wonderful facts and in this respect, she certainly is full of it.
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2×3 = 9,000,000? That is a completely mind boggling statistic. You would think even a rabbit has a headache now and then. Nine million bunnies in 3 years? That’s some serious fornicating my friends.
Sadly the end of the book dealt with all the horrible ways we humans react to what we perceive as an over abundance of wildlife. Simply put…if you get in our way? You’re toast.
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Well, that’s a bit extreme.
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Climate change, loss of habitat, deforestation, pesticides. We kill even when we don’t mean to.
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Seen at the Penguin Place private conservation reserve. The Yellow Eyed Penguin is endanged.
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Another beautiful creature whose time is almost up. Adapt to the damage we wreak upon the planet or perish.
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Neither choice is good. Even if you’re wearing pink go go boots.
And after spending four hours this morning cooking lasagna, then serving it and the salad to the crew, I took a hard cider break before I ferried it all back in the house to do dishes.
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I sat, sipped and watched the mild mannered old widower school the group with a twinkle in his eye. Game after game, no matter who he teamed with, it was a rout.
And no amount of freshly tapped beer helped.
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The other three couldn’t seem to get out of their own way.
I’ve been thinking of gathering up my vinyl and moving the collection out to the man cave. Back in the day I had over a thousand. But in between moving houses in the 90’s, I stored 2/3’s of them in my MIL’s attic. Big mistake. Huge! When I went back to retrieve them a few months later, they were gone. All of them. Poof! Disappeared. When I cried foul and said what the hell, his mother denied I had ever left them there… which means she gave, or worse sold them to someone. I learned my lesson and never left anything there again, but it hurt. Decades of music and memories, gone.
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I’m not that grey, but yeah… that could be me. So now I haunt antique stores and flea markets looking to replace all the albums I lost.
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And speaking of salad dressing, (worst segue ever) have you tried this yet? I’m not a big vinaigrette fan because I generally hate vinegar… but this is fabulous. If you see it, give it a go.
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Seeing the announcement for these awards made my mind go to all the “tools” in politics these days. They’re much more deserving of being called the biggest tool than any screwdriver or drill bit I’ve ever seen.
This final picture is for The Huntress who will be starting a new job soon. I saw the pins and immediately thought of her.
A group of deer came up the other morning and since they rarely show in good light I grabbed my phone for a few pictures. If you look closely you’ll see the same doe sticks out her tongue ….
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Twice.
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That’s just rude.
Lord Dudley Mountcatten was completely uninterested in the visiting wildlife and slept soundly on the couch.
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When I die? I totally want to come back as a cat. These creatures never have insomnia.
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He roused for a moment when he heard the click of the camera…
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And then decided nothing the human was doing was worth disturbing his nap.
In Facebook’s ongoing quest to entice me to buy something, I give you this week’s selections.
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I’ve been known to have a random cocktail from time to time. On special occasions. Like Tuesdays. But what I won’t be having again is Absinthe. It’s never been my liquor of choice but a few years ago on a bar crawl vacation in Vermont, we stumbled into a prohibition style den of iniquity pub. Do I remember the name of the establishment or the town in which it resided? No. Because after the devil bartender served me 3 pretty green but oh so deadly Absinthe concoctions I was lucky to remember my own name. Nice try Facebook, but I’ll pass.
Remember how a few of the past product recommendations reminded me of things found in a sado-masochist’s closet… even though they weren’t?
Well, this week it’s a little harder to find the innocent reason for your purchase. Try mountain climbing in this…
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And finally there’s something really ridiculous that proves Facebook isn’t paying close enough attention. We have a man cave… with a full bar.
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A bounce house Irish pub would just be a squirrel attracting redundancy.
Food. It nourishes our bodies and delights our taste buds, but sometimes? It can go horribly wrong.
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Oh no, Hell no! That nasty kale leaf will never sneak in and infect my brownies. Nope. Not on my watch.
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I only have one word for this disturbing platter of homicidal fruit.
Run! Some of those berries look positively demented.
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Easter. A day of religious celebration, fuzzy bunnies and most importantly – chocolate. And while I always thought I’d take my Easter chocolate any old way I could get it… I find eating eggs out of a rabbit’s ass to be the one line I can’t cross. ( And no, I’m not mentioning the wooden mallet you apparently use to open that ass. Nope. That’s a road I don’t care to travel )
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A prune juice mocktail. I’ll just leave that thought for further consideration.
There’s definitely a rat problem in Washington, no doubt about that. Problem is we keep electing them.
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Now, that’s just rude.
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You wouldn’t think it would take 100 years for American politicians to decide lynching is wrong, but here we are. See my comment about Washington rats above.
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It’s hard to see a legend fall. Sorry Sam, there’s a new kid in town.
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Where there's only one step from the sublime to the ridiculous.
River's world..... 