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Crayons and coloring books. The quintessential accessories of an innocent childhood.
Or not.
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I ask you, does anyone really need Penis Pump Periwinkle?
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This has got to be one of the weirdest things I’ve seen in a while… and I just posted about the Poop Strap.
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Everything is a dildo? I beg to differ….
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Anal Bleach Apricot?
I never colored my fruit trees with that when I was young.
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Because sometimes you have to suck it up, be embarrassed and buy the tackiest item in the store.
I think I’ve mentioned my husband has an old friend who… how shall we say… has a rather low brow sense of humor. And when we run across lewd, rude and crude items while shopping? He always comes to mind.
So when we spotted this nut cracker on our recent antique excursion, we knew we had to buy it.
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Carved out of wood and shaped like a woman’s legs…
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It’s surely every man’s worst nightmare.
And look…
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It’s anatomically correct.
🤣
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There really are some horrible products for sale, and my Facebook algorithm is going to make sure I see each and every one of them.
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You think those flowers are pretty…. but they’re not your average blooms. Don’t believe me? Click on the pic and enlarge it, but be warned.
What is seen cannot be unseen.
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I was never tempted to give my mother the gift of mildly offensive genitalia, but hey. Whatever floats your boat.
Floral penises not tempting enough? I got your back.
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Literally in this case.
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I doubt ‘eating ass’ needed a new meaning, but there you have it.
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If you’re looking for that perfect Christmas gift? For God’s sake, don’t look here.
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A crocheted octopus hat? While I admit the side view is impressive, I can’t think of a single friend who would actually wear it.
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Men? I’m going to speak for all women when I say we don’t need you to amplify your junk. You’re entirely too proud of it already.
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Be still my heart.
An affection erection?
And they say romance is dead.
🤣
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Warning:
This might be a little off color for some. ( But damn, I laughed!)
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See?
Off color.
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Admit it. You pictured one too….
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And who can blame her?
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Wow, indeed.
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My male readers are cringing right now.
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I tend to agree. That was an award worthy entry.
And because you know I have to, here are my contributions:
The Wizard of Foreskin. ( Bet Dorothy didn’t see that coming )
The Best Years of Our Foreskin. ( Is there an expiration date? )
Star Wars Episode V – The Foreskin Strikes Back. ( When your light saber is on the fritz )
Snow White and the Seven Foreskins. ( Now there’s a mental image no one needs )
(With apologies to Jimmy Stewart) It’s a Wonderful Foreskin.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Foreskin. ( I’m doubting they see much sunshine )
No Country for Old Foreskin ( We are a youth based society )
All the President’s Foreskin ( I refuse to comment on that one! )
Night of the Living Foreskin ( Nice to see some zombie parts are still operational )
Rebel Without a Foreskin ( Sorry James )
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Foreskin ( Golden ticket my ass )
I’m afraid to say I could go on like that forever. It’s addicting.
But it’s your turn. Please add to the list.
😈
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I’m sorry, but these are a hoot and I simply have to share.
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Yeah, you know it’s going to be good.
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Told you!
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Well yes, that’s just good manners.
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A footlong doesn’t require a blessing… it requires an exorcism.
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Family. It’s so important.
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When an eggplant just won’t do.
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Admit it, you’re snorting with laughter too.
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A card game of weird conversations? Count me in!
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Oh man, I might have to buy this.
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I’m dying.
🤣🤣🤣
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Carrie sounds a tad disappointed…. and who can blame her?
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The abyss!
🤣
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I live in Maine and have gone clamming… but never for those.
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If you have any to add… please feel free.
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Art for Art’s Sake.
Noble words, but do they apply to off color road graffiti?
Let’s ask the woman in my town who discovered a piece of art and posted it on Facebook….
Well, yes.
That is a rather large skin flute, dipstick, tallywacker, schlong, piece of art.
And apologies for the photo censorship, it wasn’t me.
I’d never deface someone’s Johnson, knob, love muscle, trouser monkey, creative expression that way.
I did however get a kick out of the comments on this post.
Of course.
That’s what I thought when I first saw it as well.
I’d always been told size doesn’t matter.
Clearly, that was wrong.
Butterfly?
That’s sweet, if mildly disturbing.
And yes, considering the size and scope of it?
That’s probably sound advice.
River's world..... 