Tag Archives: humor

I’m going out on a limb here….

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I’ve been meaning to share this with you for a while now… ever since Swinged Cat  asked me about it in the comments of this blog. 

“It” being strange and/or supernatural events. If that’s not your thing, no problem….  feel free to skip the next few posts.  It wasn’t my thing either. Until it happened to me. Not so easy to ignore then.

As most of you know I lost my father when I was 14.  I was an only child of older parents and a total daddy’s girl.

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Dad and me, baby

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His loss shook my world to it’s core. Heck, I’m 57 years old, and to be honest I still haven’t gotten over it.  Anyway…. back in 2013 my best friend gave me a very odd Christmas gift.  “An Evening with Spirits” which was an hour long private session with a psychic. Now before you roll your eyes (like I did) it should be noted this was her daughter’s old college roommate and not some loon on the street corner. She’s traveled the world, studied numerous religions and spiritual disciplines, worked with the most respected people in the field ( you’re rolling your eyes again, I know…  because I did it as well). But I assure you, my girlfriend is the most down to earth, no nonsense, grounded New Englander you’re apt to meet so if she said this woman was the real deal and forked out a major amount of money for a reading? I had to go along.

The following is copied from my old blog site, and while I normally don’t do that type of thing…. it was written right after the experience and was a harbinger of things to come. Read on if you’re interested.

A Twilight Zone moment….. For Friends Only

Added: Saturday, January 26th 2013 at 6:38am by rivergirl

Friends only because I really don’t need a larger crowd of people thinking I’m crazy.

As you know, I’m using my unique Christmas present this weekend and will be visiting the psychic I posted about earlier. Me, seeing a psychic. And they say pigs don’t fly.

So yesterday I’m sitting on the couch reading an interesting book about Tibet. It was full of legend and lore and spirits and demons…..which got me thinking about my upcoming reading. Basically I was wondering if it would be amazing or a total waste of time.  Contact with my late father would be a dream, but we all know how rarely those come true. Flooded with bittersweet memories of my father, I put the book down and looked up at our mantle where an antique English clock of my father’s sits.

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It’s a pretty little thing that my mother gave us 29 years ago when my husband and I moved into our first home.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t work. Hasn’t for the entire 29 years we’ve owned it and since it has a rather special pedigree….

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I never wanted to take it to just any repair shop to be fixed. Call me lazy, call me cheap… but there you have it…. it doesn’t work.

Until yesterday when I was sitting on the couch thinking about my father and the damn thing started ticking.

I’m not kidding…. I almost had a heart attack.

My jaw dropped, and I think I started shaking.

I jumped up to make sure I wasn’t hearing things and I swear by all that’s holy the stupid thing was working.  After more than 29 years.

WTH!

Coincidence? I don’t think so.

Crazy lady hearing things? I’d be the first to say so if it hadn’t happened to me. The clock ticked for almost half an hour, and naturally stopped right before my husband got home from work.

Other people talk about experiencing weird things like this and I scoff. But I’m here to tell you when it happens to you? All bets are off.

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Update.

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And I know more than a few of you have been waiting for this …

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Lord Dudley Mountcatten was not pleased with the new litter in his box.

How not pleased was he? Every time he needed to poo….

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I caught him digging in my houseplants. He would pee in the box, but not poop…. and it was a total nightmare. After picking him up and placing him in the box at least 426 times… only to have him jump out of it like it was on fire… I gave up and switched back to the old litter.

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With predictable results. $29 bag of Skoon?

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You can kiss my ass.

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I love my town.

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In the continuing series Small Town Life Be Different…. here are the latest missives from mine.

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This was so sweet. Our local UPS man… who distributes doggie treats on his route… is in the hospital with pneumonia, so all his four legged customers posted pictures.

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Because traffic alerts in the country are less about speeding and more about manure.

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Every year the women of the Historical Society sew a quilt with local scenes to be auctioned off.

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The Town Office bought the first one where it still hangs proudly.

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Yes, I showed this to the husband. And no, he hasn’t removed his absolutely no chickens ban.

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Yikes. Critters that crawl under your house and die are the worst. But I can’t say I’ve ever known one to stink of garlic. And speaking of stinking…

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Word to the wise… if you think it’s your year? It most definitely is. 🤢

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As he predicted, this man’s post got a whole lotta hate. He’s new to the area… and I’m guessing he isn’t going to be very popular. Buying a house in a rural part of Maine means generations of the previous owners might still be inhabiting your back 40. A man up the road from us has a cemetery from the late 1700’s on his land. He doesn’t know the family or their descendants, but lovingly cares for the plot all the same. It’s called respect.

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If you’re ever in New Hampshire..

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I highly recommend you visit the Tamworth Distillery.

http://tamworthdistilling.com/

The husband and I discovered it a few years ago and were instantly hooked.

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It’s a lovely place where they grow herbs and wildflowers…

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And has a fabulous tasting room, cafe, bakery and apothecary type gift shop.

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But what I really go there for?

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The infused gin. Like this bottle of plum the husband brought back for me when he was in the area last week.

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It’s fabulous…. though not exactly cheap.

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While I usually have it with just tonic, yesterday I was in the mood for a proper Tom Collins. The plum turned it pink… and I admit I was tickled the very same color.

👍

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Pandemic humor.

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Still here. Still laughing… even when it’s not so funny anymore.

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Seriously, you’ve had a year to figure it out. WTH?

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Call me crazy, but I still think that’s a good thing.

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Yes, hang on to your Charmin…. toilet paper shortages could be just around the corner again.

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I think I still have 45 rolls from the first Oh no, I’ll never be able to wipe my butt again! apocalypse…. so I’m good. The rest of you? Good luck.

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It looks like home schooling is winding down now with kids going back to the classroom…. but something tells me mommy’s sippy cup might still have a bit of the grape left in it.

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True that.

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So, Skoon.

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( Yes, I’m really going to blog about cat litter. Dudley is a new family member and the boring minutia of his daily life must be shared, just like mine. Enjoy! )

The weird cat litter came in the mail today.

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And it must be seriously odd, because look at the expression on that cat’s face.

First impression?

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The pieces are large, tis true… but their claim of being dust free is an unadulterated lie. A veritable lung clogging cloud rose from filling the box which you can see by how much stuck to the sides.

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The very high sides of yet another box I purchased in the ongoing how do I stop the litter flinging saga. This is number 5…. but who’s counting?

As for Dudley –

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He wasn’t impressed. After walking around it a few times…

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He put two feet in…

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Then turned around and said, WTH mom? You can’t blame him, the poor guy has had a new toilet every week since he moved in. But I’m a determined soul, and will figure out a solution if it kills me. Me, and my wallet.

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Random

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Remember when I posted about giving the husband some Red Sox memorabilia for his birthday?

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Here’s Lord Dudley Mountcatten sitting above the mint condition 1968 pennant. It arrived in a long padded box, wrapped in layers of wax paper, tissue paper and bubble wrap. It was cherry! Until Dudley pounced on it, ripping it in two places and punching a giant tooth hole in the tip. Sigh.

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Here he is eyeing the kinetic sculpture when my husband gave it an inaugural twirl.

Needless to say I put that out of reach shortly after.

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Cats, I love them… but it doesn’t mean they don’t drive me crazy.

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I got this announcement from WordPress the other day. And while I’m flattered they’re keeping track of my posts, I had to wonder at the random number. Is 1337 something to celebrate?

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I ordered this customized coffee mug for a friend and can’t wait to give it to her. ( our names are underneath the chairs but have been removed to protect the not so innocent ) That’s me on the left with the margarita and the figure I haven’t seen for 20 or so years. Hair, drinks, skin tone and shirt are customizable but they didn’t have an overweight and menopausal option, go figure.

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But I admit, it does describe our relationship perfectly.

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In other news…. I’m scheduled to receive my first Covid vaccine this morning. Maine has done a remarkable job with the roll out and I’m looking forward to being on the road to fully protected as well as doing my part to stop the spread of this horrible life altering virus.

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You show me yours, I’ll show you mine.

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Now, now… don’t get excited. I live in Maine, I’m talking lobster.

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There was a state wide contest and even our local pub co owner joined in.

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Ooh… a blue!

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If you’ve never done it, or even thought about it? Trust me, lobstering is hard work.

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You battle the weather, the equipment and the ocean. Fisherman die or are lost at sea every year. I’ve personally known two.

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And yes..

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Lobsters really are this small in the beginning.

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Cuddly? Not so much.

But damn, they sure are tasty.

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