Living in Maine affords it’s residents numerous opportunities to attend fabulous competitive events. There are lobster trap runs, belt sander races, frying pan hurls, skiing Santa races, rubber duckie races and pumpkin drops. We even host the North American Wife Carrying contest.
But this year I missed a new one.
I missed it!
The social event of the season…. and I missed it.
Who knew you could have so much fun with a zucchini?
Besides that guy.
And okay, maybe her.
But either way, I missed a stellar event and will have to be sure and mark my calendar for next year.
So the last time I did one of these quite a few people knew what I know, and that’s disappointing.
So I’m upping my game, reaching deep into the grey matter to find some heretofore unknown tidbits because….
Did you know….
Hedgehogs were called urchins in medieval times?
The first recorded use of the word “hedgehog” wasn’t until the 15th century.
Did you know…
In France you can marry a dead person?
Article 171 of the French civil code states, “The President of the Republic may, for grave reasons, authorize the celebration of the marriage where one of the future spouses is dead.”
Maybe it’s just me, but is that really cause for celebration?
Did you know….
Pope Adrian VI died after a fly got stuck in his throat as he was drinking from a fountain?
That couldn’t have been pretty.
Did you know…
Robert E. Lee wore a size 4 1/2 shoe?
That doesn’t speak well for the size of his….
Oh, never mind.
Did you know…
Endurance training that involves alternating between high and low intensity is called fartlek? It comes from the Swedish word fart, meaning speed and lek, meaning play.
Oh, those silly Swedes.
Did you know….
The amount of potato chips Americans eat each year weighs 6 times more than the Titanic.
Damn. That’s a lot of spuds.
The only truth in advertising you’re ever apt to see.
Remember a while ago I posted a picture of the sunflower seeds the chipmunk from Hell had planted in my petunias… and how they were growing?
Well over the past few weeks they grew tall and budded, and then started disappearing. One by one… shredded, stripped of leaves, and gone.
I’ve seen a few grasshoppers, so I thought maybe that was the reason.
How pathetic is that?
One lone stalk remained.
Then I woke up this morning and saw….
A woodchuck…
On the table.
That’s something I hadn’t seen before.
First there was a little pole dancing….
Then he got down to business.
So now I know why there won’t be any blooming sunflowers this season.
He made short work of it and left me this…
As well as this…
Yes, I could have yelled and scared him off, but I admit … I laughed instead.
We’ve had woodchucks all year and they haven’t touched a single plant, shrub or flower. Which if you’ve ever had woodchucks, you know is highly unusual.
So I let the little devil have the sunflower.
The fact that he can even get his fat butt up on the table to begin with is comical and worth the price of a sunflower to view.
You may remember me posting pictures of our little red barn/shed.
We use it as a shed, but it was originally a small barn complete with horse. The horse is long gone…. and 40 odd years later?
The barn/shed is almost gone as well.
Falling apart?
You could say that…
Rotted wood?
The mere fact that it’s still standing never ceases to amaze me.
It’s horrible. An eye sore on our otherwise lovely property. The bane of my existence for a long, long time.
It’s state of disrepair is the main reason we spent $50,000 and 7 years of nights and weekends building a new and much larger barn.
The plan? All the mowers and weed whackers, the snow blower, the tractor and assorted yard tools that were in the shed/barn were supposed to go into the new barn…. and the eyesore would be torn down.
But that never happened, and now the husband….. who has already filled the new barn with CRAP wants to rebuild the shed/barn to continue housing the mowers, tractor etc.
So this is happening.
Husband deemed part of the interior framing sound, and started what I thought was deconstruction of the back half…. which needs to be completely rebuilt..
Now my idea of deconstruction consists of ripping off the roof, then the walls. The husband’s?
I’m not quite sure.
He put up a new piece of wood…
Ostensibly to brace the roof… though why you need to brace something you’re tearing down is beyond me.
But look at the piece he’s bracing! Rotted doesn’t begin to describe it…
Then…
Yeah. He trimmed it…
The rotted piece of wood.
He sawed off a section of wall… by hand, even though the chainsaw was right there.
And made a bigger hole.
He elongated the brace….
And added wood running along the bottom.
He was supposed to be tearing it down…. so WTH?
Naturally I had to ask.
And naturally, he wouldn’t answer.
It was hot, he was cranky and I dared to question his technique.
Hanging over everything like a gentle blanket of white…
In some places there was a sharp delineation.
As if it cut by a knife.
But as it started to lift…
I looked way out into the back yard by the woods and saw…
A piner!!
I did!
And in the 17 years we’ve lived here?
Not one single porcupine sighting… until now.
There’s elusive creatures, solitary by nature. Shy, quiet and slow… but apparently willing to high five in Philly.
(I totally need to visit Philly now, damn it.)
Sadly, while we see plenty of them dead on the side of the road…. we’ve never seen one at our house since the majority of our property is open lawn or field and they prefer the wooded areas.
So… a piner!!
I was thrilled… and attempted to creep across the back lawn to get a better picture. Naturally, I don’t creep well and he spotted me….. and shimmied down the tree before I could get close.
But I saw a piner on our property and have blurry photos to prove it.
I read an article the other day that was so good it might need to become a blog series.
It’s about words.
Stop that.
It’s going to be great, I promise.
English is a funny language and apparently if it’s not your mother tongue, can be quite difficult to learn. So naturally it stands to reason there would be a large collection of foreign words with no direct English equivalent.
Let’s explore that.
Kummerspeck (German)
Excess weight gained from emotional overeating.
Literally, grief bacon.
Grief bacon!
It’s official.
Kummerspeck is now my new favorite word.
Do I like bacon?
Indeed I do.
Do I care that it’s bad for you?
No. I do not.
2.Mencolek (Indonesian)
The old trick where you tap someone lightly on the opposite shoulder from behind to fool them.
Where was this word when I was young?
I totally slayed Mencolek in the 3rd grade.
3. Seigneur-terraces (French)
Coffee shop dwellers who sit at tables a long time, but spend very little money.
Funny….
In English we just call them cheap.
4. Slampadato (Italian)
Someone addicted to the UV glow of tanning salons.
I think we all know one of those.
And finally..
5. Pana Po’o (Hawaiian)
To scratch your head in order to help you remember something you’ve forgotten.
This is not a technique I’m familiar with, but then I’ve never been to Hawaii so what do I know?
River's world..... 