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I saw the perfect wineglass for the man cave bar on a friend’s Facebook page the other day.
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So if anyone knows what store this is, please let me know.
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Ugh.
How about you run over them with your studded snow tires instead.
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Dinosaurs make everything better.
Follow me for more helpful holiday hints and lifestyle advice.
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Admit it, over the years you’ve received some truly awful holiday gifts. No matter how well intended, that 1,001 Uses For Fruitcake recipe book sucked.
So this season instead of making a list of the things you want?
Make a list of the things you don’t.
I’ll start…
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I don’t want a set of cat butt coasters with strategically placed pink dots. Nope.
Not now, not ever.
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Santa’s Sweaty Sack?
Santa is everywhere this time of year, but perhaps we should try to reduce the trauma to our children and leave his odiferous sack out of the equation.
But topping the list of things I don’t want for Christmas?
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Urinal shot glasses.
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That gift is a sure way to get yourself barred from the man cave.
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Have you noticed the new trend in flour? They make it out of everything now. Back in my day you had Gold Medal and the only choices were 1 pound or 5. Now? There’s rice flour, almond flour, spelt flour and….
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Good grief, don’t people know the only acceptable alternative use of watermelon is margaritas?
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I saw this coffee table in Home Goods the other day and it made me wonder….
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Has caging misbehaving children and dinner guests now become acceptable?Because I’m fine with that.
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Crocs…the hideous abominations are everywhere.
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They’re basically the Honey Boo Boo of footwear and people need to stop wearing them.
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And fruit themed Crocs?
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Do nothing to alter my opinion of these pathetic plastic horrors. Please… for the love of all that’s holy, let these things die the natural death of outdated ugly footwear.
Like Jellies.
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They were hideous, but at least they had the decency to die.
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Would I like a Hermès bag? Sure.
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Would I like a Hermès bag made from fungus? Oddly enough, I would not.
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Say it isn’t so. Good grief… the model doesn’t even look happy.
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On a list of ridiculous things no one needs? This has got to be in the top 5.
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$1,000 a pair!
You might as well wear a sign that says “Yes, I’m a moron. Thanks for noticing”
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This first one is sure to be a favorite on Valentines Day.
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Because nothing says I love you like petrified beef.
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Good God, do these things still even exist?
Please, for the love of all that’s holy… no.
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For when you really want to throw down like Hamlet.
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This.
This is really what’s wrong with America. We’re too damn lazy to sit up.
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Pfft. I call foul.
Everyone knows Alfred Von Wigglebottom wouldn’t be caught dead on anything less than Danish Modern.
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River's world..... 