Remember the beautiful mallow I planted this spring?

They were doing so well.

I’d found the perfect spot for them and was looking forward to years of  beautiful blooms.

But it won’t happen.

Because…..

So I sprayed.

And they ate right through it.

I sprayed again.

It didn’t repel anything. Matter of fact, I think they liked it better that way.

So I sprayed a third time.

You know where this is headed right? I spread red pepper flakes, I scattered moth balls… it didn’t matter.

And now?

My beautiful mallow look like this:

The adorable  and quite ungrateful, I feed them apples for Christ’s sake!  little furry creatures discovered my mallow and decided to keep noshing no matter what deterrent I tried.

Yes, I’m talking to you.

Apparently mallow is a tasty woodchuck treat, and they made short work of my once gorgeous plants.

They nibbled so much and so quickly, I had to dig the plants up and put them in pots on our deck.

And then….

Yeah.

The  I still love them but they’re trying my patience  tiny devils climbed up on the deck, tracked down the mallow and tried to munch them right in front of me.

That’s balls.

So now?

My ugly ass, half dead, skinny, leafless stalks of mallow are up on the table looking ridiculous while I ply them with Miracle Grow and hope for the best.

But I am really not happy.