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I saw an article the other day that made me look twice.
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I’m extremely environmentally conscious, so color me intrigued.
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Grandma = a nice Marsala sauce?
Stranger things have happened. ( To me anyway, you might lead a normal life. )
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All kidding aside, why not?
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$1,350?
We paid a lot more for my father in law’s coffin… and ain’t nobody going to harvest that for risotto.
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If you’re not familiar with the tradition , every year Google releases a map of the most popular Super Bowl food searches by state.
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Being game day, I’m posting this helpful hint of what not to eat while watching Mahomes take Brady down a peg. Maine clicked in with traditional nachos, but some other states seem to have lost their minds.
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Vermont went a different route. But then again, they usually do.
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Oh, hell no Nebraska.
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This just keeps getting worse.
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Jesus. Do people not know how to snack anymore?
Chia seed at the Super Bowl. WTF!
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You never know what you’ll find on the shelves these days.
And some of it I wish I hadn’t.
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I don’t care how healthy it’s supposed to be, that looks disgusting.
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I tried to talk the husband into buying these for the man cave bar, but couldn’t. And they were on sale too.
Shame, that.
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I don’t know about you… but I’m thinking any juice that comes out of a goat can’t be very sanitary.
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I dealt with the toilet paper shortage.
I survived the run on flour.
But the newest Covid related tragedy might just tip me over the edge.
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Yes, boys and girls…. our fettuccini Alfredo is about to put a bigger dent in our wallets.
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God damn you Corona virus! Isn’t it enough you’ve made a trip to the hardware store seem like a big day out?
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Leave my cheese alone!
*She says as she allots more money in the budget. Who needs those pesky prescriptions anyway?*
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Is nothing sacred anymore?
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You have the organic aisle.
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You have the health food aisle.
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And clever word play aside….
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No.
Take your hummus back to your alternatively fueled, natural fiber yurt and keep those nasty chickpeas out of my junk food aisle!
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Because so far, 2021 isn’t very funny.
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That looks about right.
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A groaner for sure.
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I’ve always thought hot dog ingredients fall under the “you’re better off not knowing” category.
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Well, that’s my plan.
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And we all know the sequels are always worse than the original.
Damn.
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But drop what thoust is doing and get thee to the nearest Wal Mart forthwith.
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Yes, that Wal Mart.
And I know, you’ll need to wear blinders or your faith in the human race as a species will spiral down the drain…. but trust me. This time it will be worth it.
Because during a begrudged trip there the other day to buy bird seed since both our local stores were out?
I found this:
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And holy guacamole Batman! There’s a little taste of paradise in every bite. Rich, sweet, and buttery…. I don’t even care if I’ll have to let my pants out at the waist next week.
And if that’s not enough to entice you to walk down Wal Mart’s hallowed halls?
Here’s an added bonus.
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I’m an avid reader, some might say voracious. I never feel complete until I’m knee deep in a good book and if I don’t have a stack of at least 10 ready to go? I get twitchy.
Needless to say I live on Amazon and worship their Prime 2 day delivery. (If you mention the word Kindle? You’re dead to me. Reading is, and always will be, a tactile pleasure. Period.)
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About a week ago I did the unthinkable and ran through my unread pile in record time leaving me with *gasp!* only one book unread.
So just as I logged on to cruise the new releases, the husband started hollering at me to go help him with something in the barn. Rushing, I made a few quick picks because bookless is something I can not be. Without fully reading descriptions or reviews, I picked this one about a food critic because it had 4 out of 5 stars.
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Well… technically it is about a food critic. But after sampling an exquisite torta ai fichi e limone, she has raunchy, not to mention quite descriptive, sex with her lover… kills him… and then harvests his tongue to cook and savor later.
Yes. She’s a sexually insatiable Hannibal Lecter.
*Note to self- always read descriptions and reviews*
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I dislike Pepsi and find it sickeningly sweet.
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So Apple Pie Pepsi? That’s a hard pass.
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While this sounded like a cute idea?
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The aesthetics leave a lot to be desired. That looks less like a mouthful of chocolate chip cookie and more like a mouth filled with…. well, never mind.
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Sorry, but my cabinet doors aren’t playing loud music past 10:00 pm or yelling at their husband to pick up his dirty socks. No noise suppression is required.
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First they want me to exercise with rubber bands, now they want me to wrap them around my mattress? I’ll tell you right now…. neither one of those things will be happening anytime soon.
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No.
Just, no.
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On our way home from the antique mall the other day, we stopped at a bar.
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You’re shocked, I know.
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One Paloma in…
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The husband started examining bar chairs.
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They were tall, sturdy, rustic… and swiveled.
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Two Palomas, a cup of clam chowder ….
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A Cosmo and a Cajun fried chicken sandwich later….
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The husband decided he wanted these exact chairs for his bar.
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After tracking down the restaurant’s owner we discovered they were custom made by a company an hour and a half away….
So away we went.
To be continued.
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River's world..... 