Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve experienced many terrible storms over the years. When we lived down south we had trees come through the windows and parts of our roof ripped off. The destruction is real and nothing to be taken lightly…..
That being said, we also had a sense of humor.
We had to.
And while my heart breaks for the people of the Bahamas suffering the devastation of Dorian, I’m twisted enough to laugh along with my friends in Florida who were spared the worst of her.
Their FB page had this the other day…
A very useful thing when you’re living on canned goods and snacks because there’s no electricity.
They also posted this pic of their local grocery store.
Now really… how bad does your bread have to be to be the only brand left on the shelf during a hurricane?
When it’s hot in Maine? You head for the coast where the sea breeze cools the temperatures considerably.
So that’s what we did on the July 4th weekend.
We battled the tourist traffic on Route 1 and headed north with a cool and calm demeanor.
Seriously….. there’s a reason we call you people Massholes. You’re not going to find a barista on every corner in this state, please go back to Boston.
Boothbay Harbor was packed, so we kept going.
Through downtown Rockland where they clearly wanted us to eat something. Hopefully not the building itself.
And through downtown Camden where the cows are always smiling.
Camden is a gorgeous harbor town with lovely old homes lining both sides of the main street.
This one always catches my eye…
Not your typical New Englander to be sure.
We wanted to stop for a drink and a bite in Lincolnville….
But sadly the Whale’s Tooth Pub didn’t open till 4:00pm.
It’s hot in Maine. Really hot. Surface of the sun hot.
Too hot to drink hot.
Okay… I got carried away there, it’s never too hot to drink. But we’ve been in the low 90’s with high humidity for days and that’s simply too hot for me. I don’t like hot and come from a long line of women who detest sweating.
(Actual portrait of my ancestress)
So on the 4th? We headed to our friend’s camp at the lake for the day.
There were cute young people in hats…
And boating…
And swimming…
And frozen raspberry margarita consumption for those who were doing neither.
Saturday we had tickets to an afternoon festival promoting local beer and food. It was called The Taste of Summer and was being held on the old Navy base. The band were friends of friends and we were looking forward to it. Until the heavens opened up on the way over….
It was raining, thunder was booming and people were standing on line wearing trash bags.
We sat in the car for a while, thinking it would pass… which is when it started to hail and festival goers ran for cover.
Seeing that trash bags aren’t a good look for me, and I generally prefer to do my drinking while dry…. we left and headed for Boothbay Harbor.
Which is always a good idea.
Boothbay is one of our favorite places to walk…
To sight see…
To eat…
And yes, to drink.
(Don’t be shocked, it’s been know to happen on occasion.)
First stop… The Boathouse Bistro.
Best damn food in Boothbay Harbor.
Appetizers were Coconut Lime Ginger Mussels for the husband and my friend.
Those babies were huge!
Cajun Shrimp and Cheesy Grits for me.
I hate grits. I love these.
Enough said…
A Harborside Lemonade and a Summer Bliss later, I dove into Pan Seared Scallops on Parmesan Mushroom Risotto with Citrus Wilted Arugula. You could have killed me right then and there… and I’d have died happy.
Husband had a deconstructed Beef Wellington with split lobster tail and goat cheese mushroom compote.
Girlfriend had 2 rum punches and a Bourbon Brown Sugar Glazed Ribeye with rosemary fingerling potatoes and broccolini.
We were happy campers.
But onward.
Technically it already had, we were two cocktails in… but the bar hopping portion of our afternoon/evening will now commence.
Trust me when I say a good time was had by all.
Second stop… The World is Mine Oyster. A bit of a dive, but keep walking… through the hallway, up the winding stairs, thru the restaurant and out on the deck?
One of the best views of the harbor.
And 2 sea green margaritas.
Life is good.
Third stop… The Harborside Tavern.
This was a place we’d never been before and though we sat at the bar instead of enjoying the view….
One extremely strong bourbon filled Perfect Storm later?
I didn’t much care. The bartender was so heavy handed she either loved us.. or hated us. I still don’t know which.
Fourth and final stop…. The Boothbay Harbor Inn, where things got interesting.
Needless to say we were feeling no pain by then.
This is across the harbor from where we started and has a beautiful view as well.
Our bartender was an adorable little exchange student from Romania named Meihi.
With whom my soon to be divorced friend was instantly smitten.
Of course Happy Hour Blueberry Mules may have had something to do with that.
At this point it started to pour again….
So what else could we do but stay and drink?
We drank. And made friends with a group that was staying at the inn.
We drank. And watched the cute bartender play bar games.
We drank. Until the sun started to set and I figured we shouldn’t drink anymore.
For this…
My cheeky friend flipped me off.
Sunset.
In Boothbay Harbor…
Is a beautiful thing.
My girlfriend trying to pole dance on the parking meter?
Not so much.
Clearly some of us had a better time than others….
(River has been called a lot of things in her day, but never a Princess.
So if you’re calling?
Make it loud.)
Princess River loves her flowers. She plants them whenever and wherever she can.
And since the Princess lives in a kingdom that’s covered by snow and ice half of the year?
She takes her plantings seriously.
When she first moved into her castle, she toiled long and hard until she had the biggest and most beautiful garden bed in the land.
In early summer it sprouted stunning displays of Lupine….
And myriads of other riotous, colorful blooms all season long.
Princess River was content.
This went on for many happy years until her husband, the evil Prince, started mowing in close proximity to the bed. He also mowed in the wrong direction.
Bad Prince.
Bad!
She asked him to be more careful.
She pleaded with him to go the other way.
But month after month the dastardly toad blew grass clippings in to her carefully tended flower garden.
(You do.
And I shall…)
The Princess weeded, she turned the soil, she mulched…. but to no avail.
After a year or two, the grass took over.
It choked all Princess River’s lovely flowers to death.
Princess River was not happy.
She had to leave the castle and hump 12 bags of mulch across the moat.
She had to wack down all her blooms, rake up the dead bodies, reset the brick border, lay weed block paper, re-mulch and reset the pavers that anchored the Royal Bath of Birds.
The sky darkened. The wind blew.
It started to rain.
And she ran out of mulch.
(Mathematical coverage formulas were never her strong suit.)
Princess River had to abandon her project when a deluge of biblical proportion battered her royal self.
She will be victorious…. someday.
Until then she will slowly plot her revenge upon the evil Prince and his heinous grass cutting machines.
Since it took me a month and a half to post vacation pics, it’s time to get you back up to speed on the dreadfully boring fascinating tidbits that are my life.
You may have heard the government had a shut down during our trip. Luckily this caused us no financial hardships, but it did mean the husband’s paychecks were delayed. And being the federal government, you know they had to make something simple ridiculously difficult.
The husband gets paid the same amount every 2 weeks. Same amount of pay, same amount of deductions. You would think they could just deposit the 2 missing paychecks.
But no.
Whaaaat?
It shouldn’t surprise you that as of today, his pay is still hosed up.
Now to the weather…
Yeah.
It’s been cold.
And yeah.
You did.
The back yard deer are hungry.
And so are the turkeys.
We love the deer. The turkeys? Not so much.
They’re comical… but they poop. A lot.
Enough said.
Valentines Day came and went…
The husband sent me roses.
And I gave him a framed shot of the night sky from the exact location of our wedding day.
I know.
We’re so special it hurts.
Of course the really wonderful thing about Valentines Day is the day after….
When chocolate is half price!
That’s the definition of true love right there.
Where there's only one step from the sublime to the ridiculous.
River's world..... 