Tag Archives: turkey

I love my town

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My town’s Facebook page was critter-centric with this week starting with this awesome visitor.

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We had one on our roof a while back but I wasn’t quick enough to get a photo. They’re such glorious fellows.

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I hear that on the zucchini. Everyone is trying to foist them on us lately.

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Outhouse shed combo. When you’re working on something and just don’t want to waste the energy it takes to walk back to the house.

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Our neighbors have lost a few birds to foxes. But I think we need to examine how #20 survived. Could have been an inside job.

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Alright, so it’s not a dog waiting at the door with your slippers. You still have to admit it’s sweet…

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Random nonsense around the house…

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It’s a shame chokecherries are bitter and nearly impossible to eat…

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Because our tree is just loaded with them this year.

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But speaking of eating…. when your neighbors start dumping tons of veggies on your doorstep because no one ever grows a few zucchini? Try this:

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Slice, dip in beaten egg, then Italian breadcrumbs, lightly fry in olive oil and serve with lemon herb aioli. Fabulous!

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In other news, the turkeys are still here and my husband is still chasing them.

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I’m laughing because he was about to lose his pants running after them. (Don’t tell him I posted this, I’d never hear the end of it.) And while I normally think the daily chasing is ridiculous as well as fruitless…. you’re not going to out stubborn a wild turkey …. those little bastards have eaten every single one of our blueberries this year. On all 7 bushes! And that means no blueberry pie, no blueberry coffee cake, no pancakes or muffins. Damn their feathered souls!

😡

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I watched the White Sox beat the Yankees on the Field of Dreams the other night. (That’s Kevin Costner in the photo.) I’m an unapologetic sucker for that movie. Never been able to watch it without thinking of my father and crying like a baby.

If I’m ever in Iowa? I am damn sure going to Dyersville and walking through that corn.

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More Dudley cuteness.

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When you chase wild turkeys from the lawn on a daily basis like my husband? You often find they leave parts of themselves behind..

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For which our cat is quite thankful.

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Have you hugged your feather today?

( Archaic reference to a public service announcement that used to run in the 80’s. Stop snickering, I’m old. )

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Lord Dudley Mountcatten was not at all pleased when we put the air conditioners in the windows after a miserably hot and humid day.

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He howled and batted at them and demanded their removal from his favorite bird watching perch. Sorry Dudley, but momma’s menopausal surface of the sun internal temperature requires cooling assistance. Adjust.

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Going, going… gone.

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Now that the man cave/ barn Mahal is starting to shape up? The husband wanted things out. My things that is.

Our old loveseat has been stored in there for years, and I was sad to see it go because it’s wicked comfortable and matched the walls quite well.

I voted for keeping it as you can never have too many comfy kick back with a beer or cocktail places to sit, but was instantly over ruled.

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The first person turned out to be the in-law of the man who stained our barn, so goodbye loveseat.

The next thing he made me get rid of was the driftwood tree. He’s been squawking about it’s removal for months now and no matter how much I tried to convince him it would be a unique addition to the barn decor?

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The minute I listed it? Three women were fighting over it. Guess I should have sold it instead.

So two of the things I wanted to keep were gone…. and guess what was added?

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A turkey foot that flips you off.

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This was a retaliation gift for the plaque I made the previous owner of the pool table after my husband beat him badly at the first game. They insisted the foot and plaque accompany the table…. so we’re now the proud owners of a petrified foot.

What do you want to bet we’re the only house on our block with one of those?

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Bird brains.

 

First let’s deal with the peckers.

Because we all know not paying attention to peckers makes them crazy.

 

 

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This is a hairy woodpecker.

 

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Why hairy?

Your guess is as good as mine.

 

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He loves the peanut nugget feeder and is an expert at extracting them.

 

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There.

Now you can say you’ve had a hairy pecker wink at you.

 

 

This is a downy woodpecker.

 

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Why downy?

Your guess is as good as mine.

 

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To be honest, he looks more like a Storm Trooper from Star Wars to me.

 

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Then we have a pair of Mallard ducks who visit daily.

 

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The female strolls around under the bird feeder collecting scraps….

 

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While the drake plops down and takes a load off.

That’s one chill duck.

 

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Big Tom turkey?

 

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Yes, we have one of those too.

 

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And finally, a Baltimore Oriole getting his junk food Jones satisfied with some grape jelly.

It would be nice if he didn’t poo all over the feeder…. but hey.

Who am I to judge?

 

Because even turkeys get cold.

 

Our local feed store is a delightfully quirky place.

Owned and operated by a wonderful man who shares our love of critters, I always look forward to shopping there.

Case in point….

When a turkey chick failed to sell last year because it had a deformity of it’s wing? He adopted it.

The bird is now large, spoiled silly and something of a feed store mascot.

When the temperature drops to near freezing?

 

 

She comes inside and stays by the wood stove…

Because even turkey birds get cold.

 

 

 

Please note there are two chickens under the table as well.

I love my town!!

Because I’m always looking out for my male friends.

 

So a certain blogger (who shall remain nameless unless he/she actually wants to take credit for this post) sent me a link to a product that I found the day after Thanksgiving.

Having just enjoyed copious amounts of turkey, I admit it made me think twice about ever eating one again.  It seems we never really know what those birds are up to pre gluttonous feast.

This post will pass along further information for what I think is probably the best Christmas stocking stuffer ever.

For your husband, your brother, your uncle, your cousin…. Hell, for every man in your life.

Give them to your mailman and the guy who changes your oil.

You can thank me later.

Snowballs

If you clicked the link, you’ll realize I wasn’t talking about those delightfully revolting pink Hostess treats that look like Tribbles.

It’s another thing entirely.

 

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No, I’m not kidding…

And some of the descriptions are funnier than the product itself.

“Summer is a decidedly, uh, swampy time for many men and the summer of 2019 has been especially hot and humid throughout most of the northern hemisphere. Dress loose and in light fabrics all you want, eventually the heat hits you in the crotch.

It’s a uniquely male problem and one underwear company has the solution to that and more. Snowballs basically wants to ice your ‘nads back into the comfort—and fertility—zone.

Being able to walk around with your ‘nads air-conditioned without risking indecent exposure is pretty appealing. And Snowballs claims their product can do more than just frost the funk away from your nether regions.”

 

Swampy?

 

 

 

Yeah, no one wants that.

 

“From setting sprays to chafing balm, ladies have a few tricks up their sleeves when it comes to handling the heatwave.

But now men have found something to help them out on scorching hot days — freezable pants.

Over on Amazon, a brand called Snowballs Underwear is selling “scientifically-backed cooling underwear”.

The underwear comes with ice packs — dubbed “SnowWedges” — that men are able to put in the freezer before popping into a pouch that sits over the groin.”

 

And before you decide the whole thing is just a joke, here’s a video to prove icing your  balls, sack, nuts, jewels, sweetbreads, Christ…what term won’t get me kicked off WordPress?   parts has actual medical benefits.

 

 

 

 

 

There.

Now don’t you feel better knowing these exist?

 

 

 

 

 

Just remember…

You saw it here first.