Wild turkeys. They’re comical and I love to watch them…
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But then they discovered my deer grain pans.
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I chased them, but half heartedly and with ridiculously cringe worthy baby talk.
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But they’re turkeys, so as soon as I walked in the house and looked out the window? This.
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So I chased them again. And that time they stayed gone for an hour… just long enough for me to put out the nightly deer snack.
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While I don’t mind them coming to eat the dropped bird seed and assorted Casa River insects, they’ve figured out the buffet of deer grain, fruit and fox food is laid out at 3:00pm and this might be a problem.
So I walked in on my husband the other day, and this was what he was watching….
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I knew it was going to be good.
Or bad.
Or so bad, it’s good.
I wasn’t disappointed.
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A walking tree stump reincarnation?
I was in!
Having missed the first third of the movie I can’t give you the background story, but I knew something was going to go wrong when the visiting doctors dug up a tree with a face and a knife in it’s… chest?
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Back at the lab, the lady doctor/heroine whipped out her stethoscope to check its vitals.
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The diagnosis? None. They were stumped… (pun intended) and left the room to confer with colleagues.
Bad idea.
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Very bad.
The rampaging evil spirit tree, which we learned is named Tobanga, ran amok and captured a South Sea native girl.
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And hurled her in the quicksand.
She begged for her life…
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But Tobanga was merciless.
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Bye bye scantily clad native girl.
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Her death stirred up the villagers and they vowed to track the malevolent creature.
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But you know that didn’t go as planned.
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This fellow was tossed into a ravine and impaled….
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Which pissed off the guy in the stunning headband to no end.
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He gathered more natives to dig a pit… and used himself as bait to lure the creature.
Edge of your seat drama. Yessiree.
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Success! We shall stab the beast with our spears..
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Light him on fire and make charcoal briquettes!
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But alas, that didn’t turn out well either.
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Headband guy was doomed.
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And chucked off the side of a mountain.
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And as you know it had to..
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Tobanga then captured our heroine.
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Her fellow doctors armed themselves and were in hot pursuit, willing to lay down their lives for the fair haired damsel in distress.
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(Except for the guy on the right who knows that bitch Karen deserved it for digging up the cursed thing in the first place.)
Bam!
Our hero saved the day with an expertly placed shot to Tobanga’s … heart?
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And into the quicksand he went….
Bye bye Stumpy.
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The natives were so grateful they asked our hero if he would be their village witch doctor.
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And though flattered, he refused… and moved back to Burbank with Karen.
Finishing up the (not so) temporary (not so) easy access heat blocker to the upstairs.
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By the time I walked in he had the insulation board attached to the zip siding board …
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Had rigged up small pieces of insulation board on the top step..
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And was busy stuffing Roxul in the small holes.
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And the even smaller small holes.
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Our old doe was munching under the apple trees…
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And Mike Pence was still where no one wanted him to be.
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So much stuffing.
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Please remember… when this barn was built it was not meant to be an airtight and heated space, so there’s a lot of scrambling required to make it one now.
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So when all else fails?
Caulk.
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And then, for the man who didn’t want to use insulation board?
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Another piece of insulation board.
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So yes, there’s insulation board, on top of insulation board, on top of zip siding.
I dare the hot air to seep through that!
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When that was finished and blocked off, it was time to tackle weatherstripping the porch door.
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You know, the free one he brought home from the dump. The one without a frame or threshold. The non standard size nightmare that has gaps all the way around it and at least a two inch above the floor clearance.
River's world..... 