Tag Archives: humor

It finally happened.

 

I swear I’ve cooked more meals in the last two months than I have in the previous six.

Virus quarantining means a lack of many things, but around here? A full plate isn’t one of them.

I never used to cook or eat breakfast. Now it’s blueberry banana pancakes and thick cut bacon.

I used to eat a light lunch. Now it’s cream of turkey and wild rice soup, a chicken Caesar wrap and a chocolate chip cannoli.

Four nights a week we used to have salad. Now it’s more likely to be a pot roast dinner with all the fixings.

 

 

We may not do much else, but damn it… we eat.

Which means I’m getting tired of cooking and craving some decent take out.

Our last two attempts were abysmal failures but we finally got lucky at a little local restaurant in the next town I never paid much attention to before.

 

 

Delectable, juicy, and dripping with sauce… these sweet and spicy Thai wings were pure ambrosia. I admit to sharing with the husband…. but only grudgingly.

 

 

There was also a stellar pizza called the Mainer. Garlic butter brushed crust with Italian sausage, bacon, onion, peppers, mushroom and olives.

I was thrilled.

I was ecstatic.

I may have drooled.

So yes, I’m going to go out on a limb here and say we’ll probably be repeating the process.

 

Sunrise, pandemic rocks, great ideas and dirty birds.

 

A post of random trivial things that aren’t worthy of their own blog.

First, a sunrise photo a friend of mine took the other day.

 

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She lives on a lake…. and I have to say that looks like a pretty sweet way to wake up.

Rocks?

Don’t mind if I do.

The Covid 19 versions someone cleverly painted.

 

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Brilliant ideas?

Yes, they’re still out there.

 

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See?

I found one.

These days social distancing is more important then ever….. so let’s commend those who go the extra mile.

 

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What?

She doesn’t know where that bird has been.

 

 

 

 

I love my town….

 

And their slightly off balance Facebook page.

 

 

 

Not off hand, no.

But I hope he finds one. Pigless is a terrible thing to be.

 

 

 

This picture of our local sheriff’s truck was posted by a resident.

Because really, who needs blue lights when you have a chicken?

 

 

 

 

This post was met with the incredulity and the scathing derision it deserved . Reveal your fiddlehead location? To a stranger!!

Mainers have been killed for less.

Fiddleheads are a precious ($15-$20 per pound) and extremely fleeting commodity in the spring. Locals protect their secret gathering spots like they do their virgin daughters. Personally I can’t stand the slimy things…

 

 

 

But Mainers go berserk for them.

And speaking of barely edible food, some well meaning townie posted this:

 

 

 

Now really, if I’m not going to eat the delicate unfurled leaves of a fern?

You can damn sure bet I’m not baking helicopter seed pods that look like bugs.

Damn.

Little known facts.

 

And once you read them you’ll realize how little you care…..

 

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I’m sure you could have gone all day with out hearing that, but since I hate nuts anyway? It strengthens my resolve that peanut butter is disgusting.

 

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Yeah.

Enjoy that sandwich now.

I dare you.

 

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I had to do a little research on this one because I grew up adoring Ted.

Sadly, he’s wasn’t always the sweet cuddly children’s author we imagined.

But I still love the Lorax, sorry Helen.

 

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Asbestos snow…

What could go wrong?

 

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True.

And quite bizarre…

 

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Well, we could all use a little more protein in our diets.

 

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People are allergic to cochineal insects?

How would they know? I didn’t even realize there was such a thing.

 

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Okay, I agree…. that really would have sucked.

And finally, because men aren’t filled with enough penile insecurities as it is.

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Sorry guys.

Penis envy is a horrible thing.

P.S. ….. When I woke up and checked WP on my phone this morning? My reader preview made me do a double take.

Damn.

The porn spammers will be back any day now.