Tag Archives: squirrel

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What fresh Christmas Hell is this…?

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Since the husband and I usually travel for Christmas, I haven’t done decorations for years. Wreaths in the windows, a few snowflake lights on the barn and a Charlie Brown tree on the table was as much enthusiasm as I could muster this season.

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And when you’ve been married as long as we have (37 years in a few weeks) presents aren’t a big deal either. We’re lucky enough to buy what we want, when we want (and he still doesn’t know my taste in jewelry) so we took a pass on that as well.

There is however one gift that keeps on giving.

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Yes, after a prolonged absence in which I continually prayed for her earthly demise…

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She was back on Christmas Eve. Looking for a way into the house.

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And taunting me…

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The little bitch.

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So if she comes down the chimney wearing a Santa hat today? I won’t be held responsible.

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No. It most definitely is not…

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Last minute Christmas gifts for the weirdos on your list.

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For those friends who like to play in the dirt?

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Pencils. They’re not just for chewing anymore…

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I thought this next one was cute.

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But realized I might be attacked by that hungry red squirrel bitch and had to pass.

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Yoga dice?

How am I supposed to play craps if a winning roll is downward facing dog.

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I see the appeal here.

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We’re building a barn bar and the husband has been known to tick me off.

Hmmm..

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Because an internal kind message will take the sting out of an F Bomb gift.

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And finally there’s jewelry.

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Because no woman can resist a man who gives her turd themed bling.

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Timing is everything.

24 Comments

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And it’s always bad at Casa River.

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Yesterday morning I saw that rat bastard red squirrel.

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She was running all over our roof and gutter probably looking for a way back into the house.

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I chased her off with the broom, but 10 minutes later she was back. She hung around for another half hour or so and for once….

I wish she’d stayed a little longer.

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Well, hello there.

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 Your timing was awful, but please come back another day.

I have multiple squirrel recipes to share.

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Motherhood can be rough

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We hadn’t seen much of mother red squirrel lately, which after the last pregnant photo I took of her.. was a very good thing.

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But she showed up yesterday…

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Looking kind of rough. Motherhood must be taking its toll this time around.

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Now if only I could coordinate her visits with this new addition to the backyard wildlife sightings….

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He could solve all our squirrel problems in one fell swoop.

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A veritable squirrel pantry…..

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I was sitting in the living room reading when movement caught my eye.

 

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On closer inspection:

 

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Knowing this was not going to end well, I went outside to  chase the little red bastard investigate.

 

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Momma squirrel was back.

 

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When she saw me, she ran.

 

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And I thought, there.

That was easy.

 

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But she wasn’t running because I’d scared her.

No.

 

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She was just looking for a place to stash the apple chunk she’d stolen from the deer.

 

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I found this piece, and 4 others in various nooks and crannies of the table and chairs.

The next morning? 3 more pieces.

So now, everyday when I go outside?

 

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I have to pull half eaten apple pieces out of our patio furniture before the ants descend.

Good times.

 

absolutely-not-

 

I hate that squirrel!

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Perfection in miniature.

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Hummingbirds.

 

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More precisely our resident Ruby Throated Hummingbird.

 

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He’s laid claim to the feeder….

 

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And ferociously fights off all the others who attempt to sip.

 

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I’ve tried to get videos of the aerial ballets….

 

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But they’re much too fast for my lame camera equipment.

 

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You wouldn’t think something so tiny would be so fierce.

 

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But even this guy keeps his distance.

 

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Because size doesn’t matter.

 

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Or so I’ve been told.

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Baby squirrel resurgence.

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They’re baaaaaaack.

Well, at least the babies are.

 

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And they’re making themselves right at home on the deck.

 

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A little too much at home for my liking.

 

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Because they’re trying to get back into the hole they all came tumbling out of last month.

 

 

Cute? Yes.

Respectful house guests? No.

 

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And then the other day, a friend helped me out.

 

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No, it’s not the same picture.

Look in the lower right hand corner….

 

 

Baby woodchuck is finally earning his keep.

Well done sir.

Carry on.

 

 

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Momma squirrel has not forgotten.

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While relaxing on the barn porch the other afternoon…..

 

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Our peace and quiet was disturbed by one very perturbed rodent.

 

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Momma squirrel was back and chattering up a storm.

She was scrambling up and down the posts.

 

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Running back and forth along the eaves.

 

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And most definitely making her presence known.

Her memory is long.

And apparently all has not been forgiven.

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What’s all the fuss about?

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I heard some Hellacious  (Yes, that’s a word. At least in Maine.) chattering the other afternoon.

 

 

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Looked out back…

 

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And saw momma red squirrel perched on the plant hanger.

 

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She was flicking her tail and screeching like a Hollywood starlet who ran out of Botox.

 

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She screeched so hard a seed fell out of her mouth.

 

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It only took me a minute to figure out why.

 

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The other visitor.

 

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No worries readers, momma escaped unharmed.

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Nightmare continued.

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So…

Momma squirrel was not happy we’d disturbed and scattered her children.

Not. At. All.

 

 

Matter of fact, she was downright pissed. And as the husband was working on fixing that awful hole…

 

 

She was positively manic, running to and fro….

 

 

Climbing….

 

 

Perching..

 

 

Even trying to get in the house.

 

 

It was crazy.

 

 

But what she really wanted was back in that hole.

 

 

And as the husband worked, she watched.

See her up top?

The longer it went on…. the braver she got.

 

 

There were times I thought she would climb right over the husband to get in there.

 

 

She was one mad momma.

 

 

To be continued…