When you have way too much time on your hands…

 

I saw an article the other day about all the amazing things people are doing with the spare time the pandemic shutdowns are providing them.

Some were worth while.

Others?

You decide.

 

 

Did Rufus McToofus need his very own adirondack chair to celebrate accordingly?

Probably not.

 

 

 

 

That’s so special it hurts.

 

 

Just…. wow.

What do you suppose those ducks are posting on social media? Can someone please investigate and report back. I’d hate for those ducks to have a more interesting blog than mine.

 

 

Finally….

A worthy use of time.

Because these things must be shared.

 

Remember the bizarre eggplant?

 

 

The  ‘extremely happy to see you’  eggplant?

 

 

We decided to gift it to our local pub’s owner/bartender/new friend.

He wasn’t quite sure what to make of it at first…. and tried to pass it off to his employee.

 

 

Who immediately weaponized it.

 

 

And then succumbed to it’s charms.

 

 

And once he saw how well it was being received?

 

 

He fell in love.

I mean really, how could you not?

 

 

 

 

Let there be light….

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Bright and early Sunday morning the husband and his friend were hard at it.

Removing the stuffing they’d previously stuffed and drilling holes for the continuous feed wires to slip through.

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This, as you can imagine…. was a royal pain in the  *ss.

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But finally,  it was ready for a light fixture.

And my husband used the pool table as an auxiliary ladder.

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Viola.

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A light fixture.

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Which receives the husband’s very technical and OSHA approved tug test.

Just kidding, OSHA reps run screaming in horror from any project my husband oversees.

More stuffing, more plywood.

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Light fixture number two was not at all cooperative, and adjustments I don’t even want to contemplate were made.

This might be a good time to mention the time my husband installed a ceiling fan in our living room in North Carolina.

It took an electrician 2 hours to undo that mess.

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But after an hour of tinkering, and some oh so colorful language…

Fixture two was up.

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Were the proper amount of decorative screws used?  They were not.

Was it in perfect alignment with the first light fixture?  It was not.

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But since this simple job took them over 5 hours?

I doubt they cared.

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  • For informational purposes only – the husband can not decide whether he wants to put ceiling fans in between the lights or just another light, hence the open middle space.

Deer me.

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He surely is a handsome devil.

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Strutting out of the woods with his son.

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Always wary of the neighbor’s dogs.

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And the crazy lady with the camera.

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The time of year I worry about him is almost upon us.

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And as much as autumn is my favorite season….

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It brings with it rifles and bullets and trophy hunters.

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And I’ll fear for our beautiful visitors.

Pandemic humor.

Go ahead, laugh.

It’s better than the alternative.

Have you ever wondered how it will feel when we eventually  (hopefully!)  get back to normal?

I’m not sure I ever want a stranger closer than 6 feet again.

This could be a real problem if Aunt Jemima products are going to disappear…

I totally need that mask.

Yeah, we kind of do.

Well that goes without saying.

Personally, I’d prefer 2 continents.

One day only!

Better hurry.

It’s all about priorities.

And finally for my horoscope loving readers….

And so it begins.

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We chose a local company and our big barn will finally get some color in his cheeks.

An oil based stain was matched to baby barn’s red paint… and white trim will finish him off.

I’ve been waiting 8 years for this…  so, yay.

The painters showed up the other day to pressure wash off the black mold. They thought this would be a quick prep, saying it would only take a few hours.

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10 gallons of bleach, one broken pressure washer, an auxiliary pump and 8 hours later…

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They recalculated and said they wouldn’t be able to get it all off as promised.

Which we told them would be the case, as we’d tried ourselves and failed.

But they got a lot more than we managed, and it looks better.

Before :

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After:

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Of course they had to move all the trim wood we’d bought to do the porch, so this is now my afternoon cocktail view.

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Not ideal.

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But hopefully it’s more temporary than my husband’s so called temporary doors.

They just don’t take the hint.

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Every single day I zap them.

And every single day they come back.

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I zap business blogs and blogs that don’t exist. I zap bot blogs and blogs that have 100 posts with no comments or likes.

I don’t need inflated follower stats and have no idea why these people, or machines, keep following me.

Can’t they take the hint?

They follow, I zap. Every day. Twice a day. Ad infinitum.

Give it up Car Kudu. Admit defeat Laundry Tips.

You won’t win.

I can out stubborn you…. just ask my husband.

Must have products I must not have.

 

Here’s another selection of must have products… this time with a twist.

These are all things guaranteed to reduce your stress level.

 

 

 

 

Sorry, but having a nail polish cocktail ring is only going to increase my stress.

The first time my nose itches? That Moonlight Madness Maroon will be Jackson Pollock-ing the living room wall.

 

 

 

Really?

I’ve got news for you, if I’m going to recline in a hammock it better be large enough for my whole body….. and a pitcher of margaritas.

 

 

I don’t know about you, but if I’m stressed?

The last thing I’m worrying about is mopping up that martini I spilled on the floor.

 

 

 

Yeah.

Because a disembodied hand is soooo relaxing.