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I don’t need this…
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But I won’t judge you if it’s something you want to try.
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Who am I kidding? That sounds disgusting. And don’t even think about wiping your hands on my guest towels after you apply it.
I will hurt you.
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Good grief. Along with all the other parts of my body that are sagging…. now I have to worry about droopy gums?
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Does lip temperature change?
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Mood lipstick of the 90’s? Hell… I’m old enough to remember mood rings from the 70’s.
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Have you ever had an oh shit moment?
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The look on this woodchuck’s face says he’s about to have one.
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This is an aerial shot of my little Maine town and I dare you to say it’s not a beautiful place to live.
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This is Lord Dudley Mountcatten and he’s a bit of a goober.
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He could tuck his tail beside him, or move farther down the window to accommodate its length…. but does he? No.
Because he’s a goober.
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Our neighbor and his two teenage boys came over last weekend and ended up at the man cave pool table. Poor kids, my husband and their father were both telling them how to play and they couldn’t have been more confused.
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Does Lord Dudley need a Princess Leia donut hairdo wig?
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The answer is no.
But his mother is seriously considering the Storm Trooper catnip mice….
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Because, come on… what’s not to love?
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I had to laugh at this advertisement the other day.
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Interesting? Yes.
More attractive? Probably not.
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But I can think of quite a few people who deserve this home baked treat.
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Have you ever fallen head over heels in love with a perfume? Become so completely enamored with it that you’ve worn it since the first day it was released? I did, way back in 1986 when Prescriptives (a sister company to Clinique) released Calyx.
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Energizing and audacious, the classic, acclaimed fragrance of Calyx is crisp, green, and ideal for the fragrance connoisseur who appreciates the unique and distinctive. Notes: Grapefruit, Mandarin, Passion Fruit, Mango, Papaya, Freesia, Muguet, Neroli, Lily, Jasmine, Oakmoss, Sandalwood, Vetiver.
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What on earth is a Calyx? Well, I’m glad you asked.
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Anywho…. this has been my signature fragrance for 35 years and while I love to try other scents, I always have a bottle of my favorite waiting in the wings.
Enter 2021, another shit show of a year where Covid is thriving but my beloved perfume will cease to exist. Yes, to my utter and absolute horror I discovered the company has halted production… and River is not a happy camper.
My second reaction…. after screaming Noooo! at the top of my lungs?
Amazon.
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Thankfully I found some at a very reasonable price and ordered 3 bottles. But after they arrived I thought hmm… better get a few more just to be safe.
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But damn it! The price gouging had already begun.
I paid $45 for 1.7 Oz …. now it’s $249 for half an ounce.
And a few days later?
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Holy Hell!
I love it…. but not that much.
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Our town’s Facebook page has made me realize what a slacker I am.
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Talk about reuse and recycle!
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This piece was so well received it will be traveling to New York State next month for an art exhibition.
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Gives new meaning to the phrase ‘one man’s trash is another man’s treasure’.
😊
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She’s back.
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And this time she brought reinforcements.
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She was running to and fro, across our deck, up and over the roof.
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Plotting her next invasion location.
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But the worst part?
Look….
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She’s trying to recruit the grey squirrels!
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I vote no.
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Annoying alliteration aside….
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The very idea of this is ridiculous.
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I’ve got news for you people… doggie doo is biodegradable. Let Fido poop under the elm tree. No septic tank required .
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You were hoping I would run out of these? No such luck…
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I’ll start –
Baby can I put my hair in your mouth?
Mildly disturbing… but not that funny. I’ll try again.
Baby can I put my baby in your car?
Even less funny. One more time –
Baby can I put my flowers in your closet?
Alright, my predictive text is predictably boring.
Your turn!
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It’s a shame chokecherries are bitter and nearly impossible to eat…
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Because our tree is just loaded with them this year.
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But speaking of eating…. when your neighbors start dumping tons of veggies on your doorstep because no one ever grows a few zucchini? Try this:
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Slice, dip in beaten egg, then Italian breadcrumbs, lightly fry in olive oil and serve with lemon herb aioli. Fabulous!
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In other news, the turkeys are still here and my husband is still chasing them.
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I’m laughing because he was about to lose his pants running after them. (Don’t tell him I posted this, I’d never hear the end of it.) And while I normally think the daily chasing is ridiculous as well as fruitless…. you’re not going to out stubborn a wild turkey …. those little bastards have eaten every single one of our blueberries this year. On all 7 bushes! And that means no blueberry pie, no blueberry coffee cake, no pancakes or muffins. Damn their feathered souls!
😡
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I watched the White Sox beat the Yankees on the Field of Dreams the other night. (That’s Kevin Costner in the photo.) I’m an unapologetic sucker for that movie. Never been able to watch it without thinking of my father and crying like a baby.
If I’m ever in Iowa? I am damn sure going to Dyersville and walking through that corn.
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River's world..... 