And woodchucks eating watermelon is too damned cute not to share.
I never thought about giving watermelon to the chucks.
But a bowl of it got pushed to the back the fridge recently and I couldn’t see throwing it away.
Let me tell you….
There were some happy little chuckers that afternoon.
Until the last piece was in sight.
Then it was every chuck for themselves.
The summer bounty continues.
And if you’ve never tried fresh lemon basil?
Please do. It’s wonderful.
Vegan bratwurst? Oh, the horror!
Kindly keep your kale out of my artery clogging sausage. If this shows up at the next beer festival I attend….. there will be blood in the streets.
My only question here is… why?
And for something on the opposite end of the spectrum…..
Which also makes me ask… why?
Heritage popcorn?
Proof positive yuppies will buy anything that’s ridiculously overpriced.
Is it any surprise this was the only bottle left? I think not.
And finally, the real shock of the day.
Toilet paper is back… and brand names at that!
So if you heard them broadcast a code for ‘crazy lady doing happy dance on aisle 13’?
Pay no attention, the unadulterated joy of not wiping my butt with sandpaper just got away from me for a moment.
One minute you’re happily eating dinner side by side with your woodchuck brother.
Until he realizes his lettuce and carrot tops might not be as tasty as what you have….
And moves in on your watermelon.
If looks could kill.
That’s one dead chuck.
We’re rapidly running out of fresh blueberries thanks to the crows…. so it was time to whip out my all time favorite blue recipe.
Lemon blueberry pound cake with a lemon zest glaze.
Ooh la la…. the batter has a stick of butter in it.
And once you add the berries?
I eat it like ice cream.
Do I make a mess when I bake?
You could say that.
But it’s so worth it.
Three loaves of buttery berried goodness.
I ran into a little SNAFU after they cooled and I started to make the glaze.
2017? No problem….
Expiration dates are for the weak.
But settle down, I Googled it.
There.
If Google says it’s alright? Who am I to argue.
Lemon zest glaze.
I tend to do more than drizzle.
Because when have you ever heard someone say, “I’ll take mine with less fabulousness please?”
Recipe as requested.
It should be noted I double…. oh alright, sometimes triple…. the glaze ingredients.
Still stealing deer food.
And when it’s too big to finish in one sitting?
They’re still planting.
And I’m still cleaning up scattered dirt.
And squirrel poo.
Help me out with this…
Aren’t teenagers supposed to grow up and move out?
A slightly smaller bounty this week as the neighbor we split with liked more of the offerings than we did.
But there were fairy tale eggplants, so I should probably start this blog with Once Upon a Time.
Once Upon a Time in Maine…. a local grocery store advertised their weekly ware.
Squid jigs at the grocery store.
You know you’re in Maine when….
And meanwhile down at the River ranch, there was pie.
Glorious lattice crust fresh blueberry pie.
No, I couldn’t wait for it to cool completely.
And yes, I had pie for breakfast the next morning.
If that’s wrong?
I don’t want to be right.
We’re extremely blue at Casa River.
And loving every minute of it.
Our bushes are full of ripe fruit and we can’t pick fast enough.
The neighbors get a bowl.
The postman gets a bowl.
If y’all lived closer, you’d get a bowl as well.
After picking, it was time to dig out my favorite blueberry recipes.
The coffee cake was wonderful.
Bursting with fat juicy fruit.
Unfortunately, the cobbler didn’t cobble.
The berries were so big the batter didn’t squeeze up through, but sat at the bottom and made cake instead.
Of course, now that I think about it….
There’s nothing wrong with upside down cobbler.
It still tastes fabulous.
So if you care to share your favorite recipe…. I’m all ears.
And blue fingers.
For Boo, as requested.
The husband stopped for gas the other day in his truck. Since I wasn’t with him, he opted for a little haute cuisine a la convenience store.
Pizza slices in hand…. he settled into the truck cab to munch.
And then?
This:
A seagull spotted him. ( Or more likely his pizza )
Husband said the silly thing squawked up a storm, pacing back and forth on the hood.
When that didn’t earn him any pizza, he attacked the windshield wipers.
Husband said it was such a spectacle, people were taking pictures and one woman asked if she could put it on Facebook.
So if you see a retired Marine in a black Ford truck looking like Tippi Hendren on your news feed?
That’s my man.
And his new seagull friend.
They say there’s a little boy in every man….. and if that’s true?
Mine is playing cowboys and Indians.
Left to his own devices, my husband could easily watch the western channel 24 hours a day. I know…. because True Grit, Fort Apache and Rio Bravo have been the background soundtrack to my life for the past 36 years.
He likes westerns, ergo he likes John Wayne.
Not as a real person, he neither knows nor cares who that was….. but rather as an idealized portrait of what a real man is supposed to be. At least on screen.
So when we went to Lowes the other day and were standing on the check out line? You know he had to grab this:
“Manly meals”.
I’m sure you can hear my eyes rolling from there.
Who knew my husband wanted to be a cookout legend?
The man who has never read a recipe in his life, but had to buy this book. And may I just say?
I was not impressed.
That is the saddest excuse for steak I’ve ever seen. And with pesto made from cilantro as an accompaniment? The Duke and his horse should be run out of town with their heads hanging down in shame.
Now correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t Texas do everything up big?
If so, these are misnamed…. because those are the skimpiest, most pathetic tacos to ever grace a shell.
And I’m from Maine.
We fill our tacos with haddock and lobster… what do we know?
I’ll spare you the Gun Smokey Barbecue Chicken and the Ringo Kid’s Skirt Steak, but suffice it to say I doubt any of Wayne’s dishes will ever make it to our table.
And now, because this is my blog and you know I can’t help myself…. here’s one final picture of the quintessential manly man.
You can thank me later.
Remember how I posted about a red pepper that wanted a kiss a while back?
Well, the creepy food phenomenon continues.
My potatoes are smiling.
And my blueberry pancakes are giving me the eye.
I’m beginning to dread going in the kitchen.
River's world..... 