Tag Archives: squirrels

She’s baaaack.

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I thought maybe we’d seen the last of her.

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But no, she was out back stealing chopped up deer apples yesterday.

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She was back on the patio table.

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And there’s only one reason for that. Do you know how sick and tired I am of finding small pieces of rotted apple every time I sit down?

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And then of course there’s the poo.

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She leaves it there on purpose, I know it.

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And may I just say, sipping from puddles of rain water filled with your own poo?

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Not the least bit appetizing.

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And please note… in that last picture? She is literally pooping. Am I a great photo journalist or what!

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I have to admit this one got me thinking…

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What is it they say…?

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Revenge is a dish best served cold.

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Hmm. I’d have no problem with supply, momma red squirrel reproduces like a rabbit.

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Now I love me some biscuits and gravy… but no.

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And though I’ve been known to make a mean gumbo…. again, no.

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Squirrel ravioli? Can’t quite wrap my mind around that.

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While I admit they annoy me to no end, that image is a trifle disturbing.

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Fried squirrel heart on crackers with cheese? You don’t see that on many appetizer trays.

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Squirrel lard cookies.

Is it me…. or do they look like little nut topped turds?

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I love my town.

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And the ridiculous things they post on their Facebook page.

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Must float didn’t seem too much to ask… which is why some smart ass posted this photo:

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I love smart asses.

In other news, coyotes.

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We hear them all the time. It’s quite eerie…

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Free roosters are the one and only free item I can’t talk my husband into.

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Hoe downing squirrels are nothing to take lightly, trust me on this.

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Chicken theft.

The world really has gone crazy.

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The rodent revolution has begun.

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It was bound to happen. You can’t evict multiple families of vermin over the course of a summer and not expect retribution.

The other day? I spotted this:

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Do you see it?

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It didn’t look impressive, just a weed growing in the gutter. But when I asked the husband to grab a ladder and remove it?

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We realized it was more like a potted plant.

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With a large amount of potting soil.

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Half of the down spout was packed with dirt and had to be removed.

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Shaken heartily.

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And unclogged with a screwdriver.

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Piles of lovely dark potting soil were packed in there for what I can only surmise were nefarious purposes.

It was momma red squirrel, I know it.

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That bitch has been plotting her revenge ever since I chased her children out of the eaves. And if you think a rodent revolution is ridiculous?

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History disagrees.

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Social distancing chuckles.

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Where there’s a will there’s a way.

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In this scenario, I see my noodle landing in my margarita… and no one wants that.

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Distance.

It’s all relative.

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Canadians have the right idea with hockey sticks. You can measure distance as well as crack heads if someone gets too close.

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Wisconsin? I don’t know. I’d rather not be on the back end of that ruler…

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Bubble gyms?

If they were covered in black fabric so no one could see my quarantine twenty jiggling… maybe.

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Excellent.

And I bet their conversation is more interesting than your cousin Darryl’s anyway.

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Squirrels are people too.

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Pffft!

What’s next, motion sensor operated baptism?

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Now that makes sense!

Because I was tired of waiting.

 

Ever since we installed the new deck railings we’ve needed to re-stain the deck. And by we, I mean me… because while he’ll constantly remark it needs to be done? The husband never does it. Not once in 18 years.

 

 

Problem is, we needed to buy a new pressure washer to clean the siding and I didn’t want to stain until that happened.

So I waited. And waited….. and waited some more.

( Never nagging. No. Not me.)

 

 

But after the husband saw the prices of a new Honda pressure washer?

I feel confident saying it’s not happening anytime soon.

So I moved things to the lawn, grabbed my brush and went to work.

 

 

Many  holy hell why is it surface of the sun  hot hours later…

 

 

I was done.

 

 

And pretty pleased with the results.

 

 

Dirty siding aside, it looks nice.

 

 

Clean, fresh and ready for the red squirrel family’s onslaught of poo.

 

 

Next morning fog shot just because.