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Because my knee still hurts and I’m bored.
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Mine are as follows:
🍸 🙄 😉 🍷 😳 😈
It shouldn’t surprise anyone that martini holds the top spot, with eye roll right behind.
That’s where I live.
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Monthly Archives: October 2020
I have to admit this one got me thinking…
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What is it they say…?
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Revenge is a dish best served cold.
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Hmm. I’d have no problem with supply, momma red squirrel reproduces like a rabbit.
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Now I love me some biscuits and gravy… but no.
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And though I’ve been known to make a mean gumbo…. again, no.
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Squirrel ravioli? Can’t quite wrap my mind around that.
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While I admit they annoy me to no end, that image is a trifle disturbing.
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Fried squirrel heart on crackers with cheese? You don’t see that on many appetizer trays.
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Squirrel lard cookies.
Is it me…. or do they look like little nut topped turds?
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Because my readers are a high class bunch.
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A new follower is always a lovely thing.
Unless it’s a bot, a business or one of those endless fake blogs I zap on a daily basis.
Last week?
A new follower of the utmost distinction joined my list. There he is, right at the top.
⬇️
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Yes, The World’s Best Farter has joined our ranks. I’m not sure whether to be flattered or disturbed, but welcome Mr. Farter.
Pull up a chair.
Preferably over there, in the far corner.
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Now admit it…
You’re jealous he found me first.
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Yay me…?
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A blogging milestone was reached by yours truly recently.
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Although I’m not sure recognition was necessary.
Now if they had a banner that said, Congratulations on posting copious amounts of useless drivel people inexplicably continue to read I could understand it.
I mean really, celebrating this post –
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Where I wax poetic about meatless meat and utterly wrong rice seems a trifle excessive.
But who am I to argue with the WordPress gods?
I’ve been here since July of 2018 and have thoroughly enjoyed the experience. If the powers that be choose to recognize my productivity? Who am I to argue.
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Yup. That’s me.
If you can’t dazzle them with content, flood them with redundancy.
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And on the 3,037th day….
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There was heat.
Yes, that’s really how long we’ve been working on the big barn. Saying we don’t like to rush things is a bit of an understatement.
But last week, this happened:
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The son of our soon to be ex friends came over to install a heat pump. It’s his business, and while I’m still cursing our rat bastard friends for giving us the free pool table that’s cost us thousands… their son is a great guy.
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Of course he might have been cursing them as well because drilling a hole through a building my husband built isn’t as easy as it should be.
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What should have taken mere minutes turned into a bit of an ordeal. And when that happens…
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You grab a hammer.
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After the hole was finally cut, it was just a matter of mounting the unit.
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With my husband… the man who has never lined up anything perfectly straight in his life…. standing back and saying, nope. It needs to go up a little on the left.
I believe my jaw dropped open at that point.
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Outside, the electrician connected power to the box… next to all the scrap wood that had to be hauled from under the barn to run the cable.
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And the rest of the crew installed the compressor thingamagig.
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Which is ugly as all get out but thankfully is on the one barn wall we can’t see from our house.
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I was glad to see they used great stuff. Because I’m sure awful stuff is more readily available, not to mention cheaper.
So…
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The big barn now has a heat pump. And future bar patrons can be assured of proper ambient drinking temperature.
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Cost of that free pool table so far?
$7,764. And no, he’s not done yet. The open stairwell still needs to be sealed off to prevent heat loss.
Free.
It’s the gift that keeps on giving.
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We’re quite fawn’d of them.
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Blue eyed Bambi is a frisky little devil.
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Running circles around his old momma.
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Yes, I give the poor old girl strawberries and blueberries.
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The little one stays close.
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Our resident buck must be getting ready for the rut because we rarely see him these days.
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And this year’s twins are on their way to adulthood.
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Below is our dark doe on the right, so named because her coat never really fades in the summer. She’s a big healthy girl.
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Random musings…
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Telemarketers have gotten clever over the past few years. They spoof actual businesses and use real people’s names with local numbers to trick you into answering.
Last month our caller ID came up with my own name and number. Though why I needed to call myself has yet to be determined.
Last week?
This:
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It’s like they’re not even trying anymore.
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Covid warnings, Maine style.
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Deer and fading backyard foliage, just because.
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Damn.
I knew I shouldn’t have let my National Geographic subscription expire. Slutty ostriches would have been a good read.
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Deep fried pickled asparagus is not my idea of an acceptable appetizer, but they’re very popular at our local pub right now.
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This describes our current weather quite well. Something for everyone.
And finally, fluffle.
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Because we all need a tad more cuteness in our life right about now.
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Pandemic humor.
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Because I’m still trying to find the humor in this shit show.
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They did. They really did…
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I feel like that’s actually happening. Not airborne bovines, but the decided lack of amazement. After surviving 2020? Nothing will faze me.
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This makes a morbid kind of sense.
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Uh oh.
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Wish me luck!
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I’m afraid I’m already there…
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I love my town.
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And the ridiculous things they post on their Facebook page.
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Must float didn’t seem too much to ask… which is why some smart ass posted this photo:
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I love smart asses.
In other news, coyotes.
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We hear them all the time. It’s quite eerie…
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Free roosters are the one and only free item I can’t talk my husband into.
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Hoe downing squirrels are nothing to take lightly, trust me on this.
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Chicken theft.
The world really has gone crazy.
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I’m on a roll…
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I forgot to mention this on the broken water line fiasco post, but my run of bad luck continues.
Yes, the fun just keeps on coming.
Torn meniscus in my right knee?
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No water or shower for three days?
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Rodents in open rebellion and probably surrounding the house as we speak?
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So it shouldn’t come as any surprise that just after the well was covered back up it started to rain…
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And our roof sprung a leak.
But wait, another sign someone has put an evil curse on yours truly?
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Birds are literally falling out of the sky in front of me.
Dismembered birds.
Pieces of birds.
Plop!
Right in front of me as I walked down the driveway to the mailbox this morning.
Whaaaaaat?
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Seriously.
Enough already!!
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River's world..... 