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Because if I don’t laugh, I’ll hurt someone.
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Proof there’s a silver lining to every cloud.
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I’m not there… yet.
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This, above anything else, is what I miss. Our plans of retiring and traveling extensively this year went right down the drain.
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Whew. Glad I made the cut…
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I wouldn’t doubt it.
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Some people just shouldn’t shake their groove thing. Ever.
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Better living through science? I rest my case.
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Building a snowman?
Very 2019.
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Neither snow nor rain… nor frigid temperatures will stop the red squirrel from Hell.
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She was scurrying over the roof and across the deck railing…
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Trying to make her way to the seed buffet.
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But this snow was light, fluffy and thick and every time she tried to walk across it?
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She fell through.
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And yes, I laughed my rapidly expanding, thank you Covid 19 ass off.
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But she had the last laugh.
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Because the bitch has learned to tunnel.
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She tunneled for over an hour.
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Back and forth.
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Building an entire red squirrel subway line.
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This doesn’t bode well for my dream of her dying of starvation over the winter.
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Or the safety of our home’s foundation for that matter.
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If I wake up next month with her sitting at the kitchen table nibbling my Krispy Kreme’s? Things are going to get real.
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Sadly, the goat is still on the loose.
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Updates are posted every few days on our town’s Facebook page.
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It’s become a bit of a hoot.
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Apparently this goat was given to the owners a few weeks ago and as soon as they opened the pen to transfer it to their yard… it ran off. They’ve tried putting out food, luring it with other goats and even set up a warm shelter near where it’s been spotted… but nothing works. It runs from everyone who tries to catch it.
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In 2020, this is what passes for hard news in my town.
Ya gotta love it.
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And I love him.
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Which is easy to do when he has things like this delivered for my birthday a while back.
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Our local florist does lovely arrangements.
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But it’s a bit of a challenge when every time they ask my husband what colors I like, he tells them green.
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And since green flowers are rather rare, I tend to get a lot of predominantly white bouquets.
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Still pretty, and I’m not complaining.
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But.
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🤣 🤣 🤣
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While downloading photos from my big camera the other day, I came across these that were taken at the end of autumn.
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Evening grosbeaks are a bird we rarely have visit our backyard.
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But that day a large batch of them dropped by.
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They’re pretty little things…
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And made short work of the sunflower seed buffet.
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Now is it me….
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Or do they look like the original angry bird?
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Since the husband and I usually travel for Christmas, I haven’t done decorations for years. Wreaths in the windows, a few snowflake lights on the barn and a Charlie Brown tree on the table was as much enthusiasm as I could muster this season.
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And when you’ve been married as long as we have (37 years in a few weeks) presents aren’t a big deal either. We’re lucky enough to buy what we want, when we want (and he still doesn’t know my taste in jewelry) so we took a pass on that as well.
There is however one gift that keeps on giving.
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Yes, after a prolonged absence in which I continually prayed for her earthly demise…
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She was back on Christmas Eve. Looking for a way into the house.
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And taunting me…
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The little bitch.
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So if she comes down the chimney wearing a Santa hat today? I won’t be held responsible.
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No. It most definitely is not…
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Wherever you are and however you choose to celebrate, I hope it brings you joy. There’s been a decided lack of that this year… and I doubt I’m alone when I say I’m ready to kiss 2020 goodbye.
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Our holiday will be small and quiet, and in true 2020 fashion the only thing Santa saw fit to bring me this year was a torrential rain storm with 65 mph winds that will melt the snow, cause a power outage, and make our ceiling spout water like the Bellagio’s fountain. Good times!
But my husband and I have our health… and each other. I can’t ask for more.
So instead of boring you with some sappy Christmas post, I’ll leave you with two pictures.
1. Is it any wonder this was one of the Christmas cards I sent out this year?
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I think not.
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2. A little blast from the past…. yours truly on Santa’s lap.
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It’s the only such photo I have, as my mother told me I ditched St. Nick at a very early age and refused visits after this one. To those who know me well, this shouldn’t come as any surprise.
Ho! Ho! Hmm….
Pass the eggnog.
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Was for the Barn Mahal bar to be finished. Seeing that we came home and discovered its beginning framework in place in mid November….
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I didn’t think that would be too much to ask. But alas, our builder didn’t agree.
Oh, he’s sent updates via text messages.
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Like the layout of the rough unfinished boards on his shop floor.
I thought the 3 graduating colors would be interesting…
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Until he sent the next update of those boards being sanded and glued. Bye bye color.
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He assures me work is progressing steadily and that he hasn’t forgotten us, but it seems the only way I’ll be bellying up for a toddy will be like this:
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Cheers!
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For those friends who like to play in the dirt?
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Pencils. They’re not just for chewing anymore…
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I thought this next one was cute.
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But realized I might be attacked by that hungry red squirrel bitch and had to pass.
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Yoga dice?
How am I supposed to play craps if a winning roll is downward facing dog.
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I see the appeal here.
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We’re building a barn bar and the husband has been known to tick me off.
Hmmm..
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Because an internal kind message will take the sting out of an F Bomb gift.
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And finally there’s jewelry.
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Because no woman can resist a man who gives her turd themed bling.
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One of these things is not like the others.
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Which makes me wonder what that poor bird did to be ostracized.
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And speaking of wild turkeys, did you know they make excellent snow shovelers?
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We cleared the path but they’re enlarging the dining room.
And speaking of paths…
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Now that the man cave is being readied, more shoveling is required after every storm.
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Welcome… one and all.
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Aside from the wreaths on our home’s windows, this was the extent of my lackluster Christmas decorating this year.
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Snowflakes lights in the Barn Mahal. Battery powered and on a timer.
Ho! Ho! Hum…
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And while Christmas will feel a lot different this year, there are some things to look forward to.
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River's world..... 