Blue Monday.

 

We’re extremely blue at Casa River.

 

 

And loving every minute of it.

 

 

Our bushes are full of ripe fruit and we can’t pick fast enough.

 

 

The neighbors get a bowl.

The postman gets a bowl.

If y’all lived closer, you’d get a bowl as well.

 

 

After picking, it was time to dig out my favorite blueberry recipes.

 

 

The coffee cake was wonderful.

 

 

Bursting with fat juicy fruit.

 

 

Unfortunately, the cobbler didn’t cobble.

 

 

The berries were so big the batter didn’t squeeze up through, but sat at the bottom and made cake instead.

Of course, now that I think about it….

 

 

There’s nothing wrong with upside down cobbler.

It still tastes fabulous.

So if you care to share your favorite recipe…. I’m all ears.

And blue fingers.

 

For Boo, as requested.

 

 

Because everyone wants pizza.

 

The husband stopped for gas the other day in his truck. Since I wasn’t with him, he opted for a little haute cuisine a la convenience store.

Pizza slices in hand…. he settled into the truck cab to munch.

And then?

This:

 

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A seagull spotted him. ( Or more likely his pizza )

 

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Husband said the silly thing squawked up a storm, pacing back and forth on the hood.

 

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When that didn’t earn him any pizza, he attacked the windshield wipers.

Husband said it was such a spectacle, people were taking pictures and one woman asked if she could put it on Facebook.

So if you see a retired Marine in a black Ford truck looking  like Tippi Hendren on your news feed?

That’s my man.

 

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And his new seagull friend.

I hate to report this….

 

But the ever dwindling woodchuck family is now down to three.

 

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Momma chuck and two children.

 

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The sextuplets are now twins.

 

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And even more outnumbered by the starlings than ever.

 

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But they’re growing quickly and packing on the pounds for winter.

 

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So much so, it’s getting hard to distinguish them from their mother.

 

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Until…

 

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She stands up.

 

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No doubt about it then.

 

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Does anyone know where I can get a woodchuck girdle?

Asking for a friend.

What is it with men and old westerns?

 

They say there’s a little boy in every man….. and if that’s true?

Mine is playing cowboys and Indians.

Left to his own devices, my husband could easily watch the western channel 24 hours a day.  I know…. because True Grit, Fort Apache and Rio Bravo have been the background soundtrack to my life for the past 36 years.

He likes westerns, ergo he likes John Wayne.

Not as a real person, he neither knows nor cares who that was….. but rather as an idealized portrait of what a real man is supposed to be. At least on screen.

So when we went to Lowes the other day and were standing on the check out line? You know he had to grab this:

 

 

“Manly meals”.

I’m sure you can hear my eyes rolling from there.

 

 

Who knew my husband wanted to be a cookout legend?

The man who has never read a recipe in his life, but had to buy this book. And may I just say?

I was not impressed.

 

 

 

That is the saddest excuse for steak I’ve ever seen. And with pesto made from cilantro as an accompaniment? The Duke and his horse should be run out of town with their heads hanging down in shame.

 

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Now correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t Texas do everything up big?

If so, these are misnamed…. because those are the skimpiest, most pathetic tacos to ever grace a shell.

And I’m from Maine.

We fill our tacos with haddock and lobster… what do we know?

I’ll spare you the Gun Smokey Barbecue Chicken and the Ringo Kid’s Skirt Steak, but suffice it to say I doubt any of Wayne’s dishes will ever make it to our table.

And now, because this is my blog and you know I can’t help myself…. here’s one final picture of the quintessential manly man.

You can thank me later.

 

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Well that clears things up.

 

I’m shamefully reposting this from our town’s Facebook page because it captures the dynamic perfectly.

Want to find out who the idiots are in your community?

Join your town’s “Friends and Family” or local group page. The gossips, the curmudgeons, the do gooders, the righteously offended…. they’re all actively posting and making asses out of themselves on a regular basis.

Read on and tell me you don’t recognize a few of these people.

 

QUESTION:

How many Facebook group members does it take to change a light bulb?

ANSWER:

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

17 purists who use candles and are offended by light bulb discussions.

6 to argue over whether it’s ‘lightbulb’ or ‘light bulb’.

Another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid.

22 to tell THOSE 6 to stop being a***holes.

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is ‘lamp’.

15 know-it-alls who claim that they were in the industry and that ‘light bulb’ is perfectly correct.

49 to post memes and GIFs (several are of Michael Jackson eating popcorn with the words added: “I’m just here for the comments.”)

19 to post that this page is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a light bulb page.

11 to defend the posting to this page saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant here.

24 to discuss the merits of LED/swirly fluorescent light bulbs

44 to claim LED and fluorescent bulbs will kill you.

12 to post the letter “F”.

8 to ask what F means.

7 to post ‘Following’ despite the 3 dots at the top right that mean you don’t have to.

3 to say “can’t share”.

2 to reply “can’t share from a closed group”.

36 people to post photos of their own light bulbs.

15 people to post “I can’t see S$%^!” and use their own light bulbs.

6 to report the post or privately message an admin/moderator because someone said “f÷×$”

4 to say “Didn’t we go through this already a short time ago?”.

13 to say “Do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs”.

1 to bring politics into the discussion by adding that (insert politician of choice) isn’t the brightest bulb. This usually takes place within the first three comments.

50 more to get into personal attacks over their political views.

3 to state sanctimoniously that this is supposed to be a friendly Facebook group and that all of this petty nonsense is a result of people abandoning courtesy.

5 admins to ban the posters who were insulting.

3 who come up with a conspiracy theory about light bulbs which either involves them catching Coronavirus or that they will fry their brains.

1 late arrival to comment on the original post 6 months later and start it all over again.

 

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Chilling.

 

This is the way we’ve been spending most of our evenings during the summer of Covid-19.

 

 

Barn porch sitting with an adult beverage…. or two.

 

 

Sometimes there’s a sunset.

 

 

The deer usually wander up for a treat.

 

 

And bark at us if we’re spotted.

 

 

Which, all things considered… is pretty frickin’ rude.

 

 

We are the treat suppliers after all.

 

 

I don’t need a formal thank you note, but a little common courtesy would be nice.

 

 

Ahh….

I don’t know much about guns…

 

But this seemed like a weirdo even to me.

 

 

The husband is always picking up old magazines and articles about days gone by… probably in a vain attempt to identify the piles of crap he collects.

I don’t usually read them but hey, there’s a global pandemic and I tend to twitch if I run out of books.

 

 

Like I said, I don’t know much about guns..

 

 

But this does seem a trifle excessive.

A deer-able.

 

We caught another glimpse of Bambi last night.

 

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Making it’s way into the woods with mom.

 

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Can I get an awwww?

 

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Last year’s babies antlers are growing…. this one’s straight up.

 

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And this one’s up and out.

 

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They’re brothers and no, I have no idea why their racks grow in different shapes.

And lastly, the end.

 

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Of the deer, as well as my post.

 

 

 

 

Products that make my eyes roll.

 

Maybe it’s just me, but when I see a list of “must have” products?

It’s a guarantee I mustn’t.

 

 

Do I need a magnetized bin to save my lint?

I most decidedly do not.

Does anyone?

With my luck I’d save lint and the red squirrels would steal it and start nest building again.

 

 

So basically this is a tarp with a square frame and handles. It costs $30 and you still have to pay someone to haul it away. Makes me glad I live in the country where we can just load up our truck and drive to the dump.

 

 

Is this a joke?

No one wants to time warp back to 80’s hair.

 

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Ack!

 

 

 

Eco friendly bamboo? Fine.

 

But charcoal bristles treated with carbon?

 

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This is not a look I care to embrace.

And finally….

 

 

Sorry, but I’m thinking my inner mermaid is better left unrevealed.