Tag Archives: toys

Toys.

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Lord Dudley Mountcatten loves to play.

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Which is why we have an entire drawer dedicated to cat toys.

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He loves his toys long and hard … and his favorite mouse is looking a little worse for wear these days.

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But then so am I, so I shouldn’t judge.

His favorite new thing to do is carry a ball to a spot under the coffee table….

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And then wind himself around a leg.

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He goes around and around in a circle and it’s quite comical to watch.

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Until I took a closer look and realized most of the coffee table legs now look like this…

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Sigh.

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Dudley does not need a spaceship.

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Yes, this really is a thing.

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And they’re not exactly giving them away either.

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Dudley also doesn’t need a scratcher that looks like a sardine can.

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I mean, Christ…. look what happened to this poor cat when he used it.

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No thank you annoying Facebook algorithm, Dudley will live quite happily without this as well.

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I’m sure the cat in the advertisement would much rather have had a bowl of tuna.

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And will be pooping in his parents slippers as soon as they go to sleep tonight.

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I’ve plugged a lot of things into my computer, but never a tuna.

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This has got to be the most bizarre cat toy ever.

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And while I have to admit plugging a fish into my computer does hold a certain attraction….

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I think it’s safe to say the minute that fish started flapping Lord Dudley would run for the hills.

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But damn, look how joyful it made this particular feline.

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Should we further contemplate why this cat is so deliriously happy to have a vibrating tuna on his lap?

I think not.

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Dudley update.

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It took almost 3 weeks, but our new boy is settling in nicely and less skittish every day.

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Loud noises like the snow plow still send him under the bed … and the jury is still out on exterior wonders. He spied wild turkeys in the backyard the other day and growled from under the couch for 5 minutes straight.

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But he’s learning to trust us and coming out of his shell. Toys help, and I’ve retrieved that fuzzy ball from under the furniture enough times to require another visit to the orthopedist.

I think it’s safe to say I’m in love.

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Even my girlfriend recognized how much having a little guy around the house again means and sent a congratulations card.

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Dudley loves his squeaky mouse, but not when we wave the stick…. so I rigged up a do it yourself playground.

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I’m sure he’s grateful, though he doesn’t look it.

It should be noted that while I love dogs and all their slobbering appreciation? There’s something about the utter disdain cats show their humans which speaks to me.

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Products for a pandemic lockdown.

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The first one supposedly has merit in the fact that you won’t have to touch strange doors.

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Unfortunately, (or fortunately depending on your point of view) it also looks like a kinky sex toy.

Next is an electric wine aerator.

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Because Covid has us all at the end of our ropes and we don’t have enough patience left to let our reds breathe on their own.

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A wobble cushion to activate my core?

Just, no.

Isn’t that what husbands are for?

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Frozen shot glasses. Now we’re talking.

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I don’t bore easily and can’t see the need for one of these…. but our friends had one at their lakefront camp last year and said it was a riot.

Ya know, if frying insect life to a crisp is your thing.

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Products no one needs.

 

I know we’ve all become lazy housebound sods who can’t be bothered to put on pants during the pandemic, but this?

 

 

This is a bridge too far.

The day I’m too lazy to stir my own pan you have permission to slit my throat, fill it with kale and put me out of my misery.

And while I’m all for cocktails?

 

 

 

I have absolutely no intention of sharing my margaritas with llamas.

Nope.

Not happening.

 

 

 

Oh, yeah.

Kitty Hitler looks positively thrilled.

 

 

 

Let’s ponder this for a moment.

Someone thought about, invented, pitched, found investment capital and marketed….. a hammock for fish.

Is this a great country or what!

And finally…. when your dog no longer needs his collar of shame?

 

 

Viola!

You can re-purpose it in the kitchen.

You’re welcome.

Because some things are strange enough for a second look.

 

This popped up in my Facebook memories today and since I wasn’t blogging here 5 years ago?

I have to share.

 

 

As seen in Goodwill, a rubber chicken.

 

 

It was a dog toy, but a more wrong rubber chicken you’re not apt to find.

I suppose you could say they were singing…. but I’m afraid my mind went elsewhere.

And for a further chuckle?

Read the detailed description that came with them.

I dare you not to laugh.

“This rubber chicken is not any ordinary chicken, when you squeeze him he makes a loud screaming sound, it can help you relaxing your pressure and bringing you good mood. This squeaky rubber chicken will make a comical addition to your dog’s toy chest! Screaming sound when you squeeze it “Squeeze me when you are happy. I will make you and your friend laugh” “Squeeze me when you are not happy. I will help you relax” “My shrilling scream will let you have unexpected fun and entertainment, relax and release stress.” Once you have this funny scream chicken you can lose your press and became more smooth.”

 

So go on….. squeeze your chicken.

Hear him scream.

 

Ya gotta love ’em….

 

Cheap knock offs.

We’ve all seen them, we’ve all cringed.

Here are some that might make you laugh as well.

 

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Clearly these are Thin Mints fatter cousins.

 

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Arm and Hatchet…

When you’re really serious about getting rid of refrigerator odors.

 

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Big Fella?

Come on…. it’s like they’re not even trying.

 

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Nut Master!

I can’t even….   🤣 🤣 🤣

 

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For those days when your hamburger needs more than a helper.

 

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Sorry…

But my mind went to a bad place with this one.

 

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I’m going out on a limb here and guessing this wasn’t made in Massachusetts.

And finally, from Wal Mart….. the king of knock offs.

 

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Because no one could be bothered to think up a real name for it.

Abby Aldrich Rockefeller Folk Art Museum.

 

This was what I’d come to see.

 

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And with a nod to Abe, we entered.

 

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By definition: